Can this type of man change?

[Cherryblossom200]

Hi all,

I probably know the answer to this. But I would still like to ask. Person in question 😆:

43 year old male, never married, never had what I would consider a ‘proper’ relationship i.e living together. Living in a flat share, bit of a free spirit type. I think you get the idea.

Have any of you ever know this type of man to change into a family man?

Probably not, I suspect 🥴

P.s he isn’t gay.

Now he has weekly calls and is building a relationship surely he wants to start supporting his daughter? Maybe pay into a savings account for her? Has he offered recently? Ever?

He's coming to stay you say? Is he expecting you to pay out to feed and entertain him while he's here?

I won’t go into too many details about his Christmas stay. But he is only staying with us a few days, the rest he is with family. I would expect him to pay for food and he has bought theatre tickets in the west end for all of us.

If he comes back to the UK and wants regular contact, then I would request maintenance.

I would prefer not talking about that side of things. I am happy with the way things are at the moment.

This is more about his personality.

DF is a retired GP. He says one of the many things he learned from his work is that most people don't change. Says it's sad when (for example) you see a lovely patient finally get out of a bad marriage, encouraging her when she asks advice, and then a couple of years later she's having problems with another bad pick.

So I'd guess this guy isn't going to change. Be very, very careful with your DD. I know you plan to be. The harm done to DC when fathers are unreliable is profound.

Oh don’t worry Prawn. I know how it can affect a child. Hence why I’m keeping him at a safe distance and partly why I didn’t want any child maintenance, I didn’t want him to have an ounce of control over my DD’s life.

I know you do, Cherryblossom200. You'd said. But it's so easy to get hopeful, I find. And I suppose it would be my main fear - that she'd get all excited about him at Christmas.