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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

I just kicked him out, am I right and now what?

2 replies

Mommycool24 · 08/08/2019 12:45

Ok so long story, we've been going 5 years, we have a 3 year old and I'm currently pregnant. My partner has always been doing drugs of some sort. When I first met him he smoked weed, but quit as I found out I was pregnant with our son. Litreally a week after my son was born he started his coke habit, was in and out of ALOT of jobs and basically left me to raise our son for the next two years on my own, we were still together but he was just never there, he was always out doing his drugs, he always told me this is it I'm quoting and I fell into a rut of living in false hope it was the truth and we could finally be happy. He got into a lot of debt and had quite a few junkies call to my door asking for the money he owed it could he get any drugs. He left rolled up bits of paper all over the house including baby's nursery. Finally after going to the doctors and discovering he had a hole in his nose and got a scare that social services could be involved he stopped. And fair dues he hasn't done it again. But the past 6 months I noticed a change in his moods, making excuses to leave, screaming around the child, always sleepy, getting lazy and in and out of jobs again. I discovered he's smoking weed again. He's spending over half his weekly money on it and not giving me any money towards bills or groceries. He's clearing off all the time and not playing his parenting roll again, we're arguing everyday, he's pushed me where I fell Into the sofa, he's calling me the most horrible names, he's tried to take my phone in temper yo throw it out the car window. He started one day so I locked him out and he kicked my door through. (all this infront of our son) he calling me a lazy useless bastard even though i do all the house work and parenting with our son (while I have severe asthma, a bent spine and I'm pregnant) so today he decided to wake up snf first thing he done was start and argument and kick off because I ate donething the night before that he bought me! I had enough and just told him to go? After a lot of nasty words and name calling he left. Am I doing the right thing? If I am what now? Ps. I'm not saying I'm an angel I have my days but I'm not a drug user or clear off on my child or go to ANY extreme that he has. Please help.

OP posts:
azulmariposa · 08/08/2019 12:58

You should've got shot of him a long time ago by the sounds of it...

Drinkingwine123 · 08/08/2019 13:53

This is the first time I have replied to a post, but absolutely felt I had to. I could have written this post about 13 years ago. I found out my Ex partner was doing coke whilst pregnant with my DD who is now 14. I stuck with him mainly because I didn't want to be on my own. He promised he would stop, we moved away from his old contacts. I thought all was ok, my daughter was born. Shortly after this I found out he was doing heroin! I went through absolute hell. He had run up loads of debt, borrowed money/stolen off nearly everyone we knew. I had to secretly set up a new home with the help of my mum and just get out! For the next couple of years after he was a nightmare, took me to court where it was proven he was still taking drugs and also had a drink problem. He hasn't seen our DD since she was 3. Please stick to your guns. I know it's hard but it's the only way. You can never risk this behaviour around children and he needs to sort himself out. Good luck x

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