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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

I feel trapped

3 replies

Ivys · 07/08/2019 14:29

Hi all, I'm not entirely sure if I need to just share or if I need advice or both... I have a little girl.. she's 4. Her dad and I are married and live together. He is from abroad but has permission to reside in the UK. He doesn't have a job... I'm providing for us. He is an amazing dad and my daughter adores him. Our marriage is rocky to say the least..we both agree to this...and I feel like maybe time apart would be good. But I don't know where he would go if I suggested this. I have thought about being the one who then leaves but I cannot leave my daughter behind, I just cannot! and since I'm the one paying all the bills I don't feel it's fair that I should have to either. I love this house! I feel like I'm trapped living here WITH him because he has no where to go and what kind of person puts the father of their child in that position..but I also feel it's taken a toll on me. I feel sad and my anxiety it through the roof! I don't want him to have to move home because it would take him away from our daughter...and she loves him and he love her! I feel so lost ...has anyone been in a similar situation...

OP posts:
NoBaggyPants · 07/08/2019 14:32

Is he a stay at home dad? If not, why does he not work?

NCSJ18 · 07/08/2019 14:34

Maybe have a break! Like not split completely but maybe stay at a friends house family members for a few days! No contact unless about DC, set rules if you wanted! IE no other people,
But have a break! And see where your head is at!
Your proberly resenting him has he doesnt work and all the pressure is on you! Maybe you see each other too much! No alone time to just sit and watch your soaps! Hope this helps x

parent999 · 07/08/2019 14:34

He can rent a room in a house for pretty cheap nearby, they usually ask for 6 months commitment, this should do nicely.
It feels like you do need to take action though eh? its not going away is it.

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