Thinking of someone else other than my OH

[Wellyw00]

I'm mainly venting but advice is welcome

I'm engaged in a 5 year relationship (anniversary tomorrow!) With a 4 year old (yes he came along pretty quick! Lol)
Anyway,
Me and partner not Been getting on for ages.
I do all the house stuff and taking care of our boy.
We almost broke up 3/4 times over the last year and I've been wondering if i ever really loved him.
Whilst wondering this, I bumped into someone I've fancied ever since we met years ago.
We went on 2 dates (way before my OH), kissed which was amazing and i can't remember why but 3rd one never happened. Then life happed for both of us, he has a child too and is now going through a break up. I found out as i bumped into him recently and we still had sooo much chemistry! Like magnets.
He knows I'm still with someone but gave me his number. And yes I then text mine. He asked me out for a coffee but he it was very last minute and i couldnt make it but i would've gone. It's just a coffee right.
He then said once he is moved into a new place would I like to come over for dinner. Specifically an omelette! To which I answered that must be your speciality and good luck with the move . Dk I never said yes or no.
I would never cheat. But also i have hidden his number and not told my partner.
I just feel like everything OM says and does resonates with me, I cant stop thinking about him and the fact he asked me out knowing i have a partner means he still feels for me too?
And then last friday me and my partner broke up for a few days . Then back together and ever since he has really pulled himself together and is doing everything now. So much happier to help etc....
But......I feel like already not be inlove with my partner anymore . Hes trying so so hard he deserves a chance.
So I'm just not sure what to do! So im doing nothing....lol....
I just know that the OM makes my whole body smile when I think or see him. Not just looks but who he is, his morals and outlook,.....everything.
I feel i can't talk to friends as that would make it real and I'd have to act on it one way or another and they know my partner.

Thanks for listenjng

You've had constructive, tough love advice -- which is exactly what you need, OP, and, in the nicest possible way, you are actually behaving (on here) like a flouncy teenager, not a 38 year old parent.

Only person who can decide what's best for you is yourself but I'll put my input anyway.
If you feel like you don't love your partner, if you have really tried and he just doesn't float your boat anymore, you should call it a day.

I do agree relationship councilling might be a good step if you haven't tried it yet though.

Once you're single, you can do what you want. If you go out with old friend, and you end up shagging, and you had a nice time, so what? You have needs to. You would probably also be on the rebound.

However here's the thing, like many posters have said, this guy probably doesn't want much more. So once you've been for coffee, once you've gone round for an omelette, once you've been in bed together, he will probably not want much else to do with you.

You cant let that upset you because you have dc to care for. You can't let that push you back to your ex because the damage is done. So what's it gonna be? Split with dp and be a single who can mingle (with all the added ballache of being single cause its not as glamorous as you may remember) or stay with a man youre not sure you love and be miserable yourself. A cross-over is not an option though. Cheating is awful.