I have a 5 year old son (soon 6).
His dad was arrested for scare mongering and domestic violence when he was 18 months old. X husband (xh) dragged me to court to get access to DS (I never denied him this but had to be supervised due to his violent tendencies) and my legal expenses are sitting at around £17 000 because in working while he got away free as he had legal aid because he's not working.
XH disappears for months at a time, then tries to make contact again just when DS is moving on and not asking for him anymore. This greatly upsets DS and I'm now at a point where I make excuses so XH can't speak to him or see him. XH tells DS he will 'make a plan' to come see him, then disappears again for months before insisting on video call again. DS get super excited to speak to his dad and then cries at night for days on end wanting daddy. It breaks my heart and makes me so angry.
I was wondering where I stand legally w this and if I'll get into trouble w the law, though I don't think XH will get legal aid for the same thing again as his case was thrown out of court because he didn't turn up for court or appointments w his (3) solicitors who all stopped representing him for the same reasons.
I'm feeling like XH's inconsistent involvement is doing more harm than good and don't quite know how to, well, make him go away tbh. He has also got another 1 year old daughter to a new girlfriend, baby was 3 months old when she was removed by social work and now lives w his parents in a different city
Clearly he's got issues...
Any advice would be appreciated.