I just need some support.
I’ve been with my husband for nearly 30 years. I’m 46!
He’s always been a liar, violent on. occasions, he made me think his depression and actions was the reason for his wrong doings.
So I stepped-up, I helped him.
I cared for him, worked harder treated him like a person that needed to get better because that would be better than accepting he is a not nice person .
He had a “breakdown” 4 years ago excessive porn, violence, lying.......and i paid for therapy, looked after our two children stepped up! Tried to make him better.
My sons best friend was murdered last December, My dad died also in December, my step dad of 30 years has months left to Live. I lost my job, my BPD daughter was at rock bottom and since December when I realised i was at rock bottom, on tablets and functioning rather than living I’ve gathered ever bit of strength and changed my job to fit in with my kids school, I’ve been at the hospital Every day, I’ve worked 3 days a week, cleaned the rest my of the week and supported my family. I was winning.
I always open my Post on a Friday. It’s my day off, I sit down open it and pay it, file it it or bin it!
I opened the post yesterday after visiting the hospital and my husband was making tea.
I saw a penalty notice as my husbands car had been in a car park for 3 hours and it was only allowed 90 mins.
I couldn’t eat and waited and then asked him where he was last fri.
Work he said!!
Then I confronted him with the penalty notice and said “no you were 49 miles away”
He stuttered for half an hour and said he had to see a supplier, he didn’t tell me as I get angry that he doesn’t claim Milage. He said he couldn’t find the supplier so he parked up at a McDonald’s and used their WiFi and worked.
I sort of believed this due to his anxiety. Spent the night cuddling him.
Woke up and I thought that if he was due to meet a supplier and he was lost he would have entered it on google maps. Asked him to go through his phone and he was surprised that the supplier was not on google Maps.
I went to work for 2 hours and when I got home my daughter said she had heard our conversation (she’s 22) and asked me if I believe him.
I said of course!
She asked me to get my husbands phone and
She would check his locations because he has been strange for weeks.
He handed over the phone confidently and my daughter sent me his locations for the last 10 days.
Sorry to go on so long!
He’s been having an affair and he has “feelings” for this other women
He came clean and told me, he said he has feelings for her.
He’s met her twice.???
I don’t care if it’s twice or a million times.
He is the best dad in
The world, he acts like he worships us all, When He told me he has feelings for another woman I just said I didn’t want to know the details and he has crossed a line (my line ) and asked him to leave.
He left.
I know I have to be on my own now/
But I’m Frightened.
I’ve been so calm! It was the last thing I thought he Would do.
I did say he was weak to allow a thing to progress into an affair and he was disrespectful and weak.
I’m on a DMP and own my house. With only £100 equity and £40k of debt........What do I do now??? Please help me deal with this maturely:’i want to howl and die.?i felt so low. I want to die. I don't j wi what to do. Please help.