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Original poster

Is this enough for oh birthday?

30 replies

Maybe2020 · 02/08/2019 15:01

Just wanted some perspective as every year I always spend a lot on my oh birthday but feel like I’ve got nothing lol is this just me?
It’s his 30th birthday in a few weeks and So far I’ve got him a gold ring he wanted (it was £500) which I now is a lot but because it’s his 30th I thought it would be something to odviously keep always too.
I also got him a t shirt he wanted, ordered him a special cake to be made and big 30 balloons which I’m going to lay all out for his birth day morning I’m also giving him £50 in his card. Does it seem like enough? I know it doesn’t matter how much you spend I just seem to always feel like I have t got enough or made the effort for some reason.

OP posts:
ShirleyPhallus · 02/08/2019 15:02

I think the cash in the card is really weird?

Otherwise the gifts sound lovely

Chasingsquirrels · 02/08/2019 15:03

The £500 ring seems loads to me, the special cake and the balloons are a nice touch. Given the t-shirt as well I wouldn't be also putting £50 in a card.
Do you live together, share finances, how long have you been a couple?

WatchingFromTheWings · 02/08/2019 15:04

I wouldn't put cash in a card after spending that much!

imnottoofussed · 02/08/2019 15:05

Definitely don't put cash in the card

TequilaMockingbird0 · 02/08/2019 15:05

Cash in a card is bizarre for your partner? Isn't your money combined?

Ffsnosexallowed · 02/08/2019 15:06

Very odd to put cash in a card - you're not his mum. Sounds plenty otherwise?

MissBPotter · 02/08/2019 15:07

Are you posting this to show off? Of course it’s enough, in fact imo it’s far too much and way over the top but if you can afford it, up to you I guess.

Atlasta · 02/08/2019 15:08

I also think the £50 looks like a strange add-on.
I think the ring and t-shirt look thoughtful and generous. If I really wanted to give him something else id choose an actual gift and not cash in a card.

OldAndWornOut · 02/08/2019 15:08

A bit stingy, if you ask me. Wink

FinallyHere · 02/08/2019 15:09

How does it compare to what he typically does for your birthday ?

Original poster
Maybe2020 · 02/08/2019 15:11

Really? Both of our families always do this! Me and my oh have always done it too, if he couldn’t decide on what to get me or vice versa we just give each other money in a card what’s strange about that :/

OP posts:
Original poster
Maybe2020 · 02/08/2019 15:12

No I’m not posting it to show off! Oh for Fucksake I was asking an opinion.
I don’t normally spend anything on my other half. Only on birthdays and Christmas we really treat each other

OP posts:
Original poster
Maybe2020 · 02/08/2019 15:14

He spends quite a lot on me for my birthdays he always takes me somewhere I’ve wanted to go too @Finallyhere
I just really want him to enjoy his gifts and his birthday as he’s a lovely partner and we’ve been through a lot the past few years. So was just asking for opinions really if anybody else feels as I do when it comes to their ohs birthday.

OP posts:
dragonflyflew · 02/08/2019 15:14

Too much. Unless you’re minted.

ShirleyPhallus · 02/08/2019 15:15

How is it too much or OTT? People spend what they can afford. When I’ve been paid less, I’ve bought cheaper presents. When I’ve been paid more, I’ve bought more expensive presents.

Very odd comments to judge what the OP can afford to spend.

Chasingsquirrels · 02/08/2019 15:16

If you don't know what to get each other and want the other to treat themselves then I can understand the cash in a card, although it is a cop-out really (and I do it with my son who never wants anything, although I just do a bank transfer now).

But you do know what to get him - some lovely thoughtful presents - which is why the cash on top seems strange. But if it's a usual thing in your family that's fair enough.

Original poster
Maybe2020 · 02/08/2019 15:16

Thankyou @ShirleyPhallus

OP posts:
Original poster
Maybe2020 · 02/08/2019 15:18

We are going away for a night and he wants to go shopping so thought cash in the card would be nice as he can then go get what he wants didn’t know others thought it was odd to do that for partners tbh lol

OP posts:
Toooldtocareanymore · 02/08/2019 15:21

sounds lovely and plenty of effort as you know both ring and t shirt is something he wants . I too agree money in card sounds off, I get it when you don't know what to get someone but you have got him gifts, if you really want to spend that 50 on him buy him 30 scratch cards or 30 cans of beer, or 30 of his favourite bars...just playing on that 30

upple · 02/08/2019 15:22

No point in asking strangers for their opinion, we don't understand your relationship set up as well as you do.

If you're not sure, get some cheap little extras to wrap up.

LookAtThatRedSheep · 02/08/2019 15:41

I think it’s the big cost of the ring that’s making it seem like not enough.
Dp and I usually spend £250 ish on each other for birthdays/Christmas on 6-10 presents, but for his 40th I bought him the Lego millennium falcon which was £650 and that was it. So although I’d spent more it felt like I got him less, so I kind of get what you mean. I don’t think it even registered with him though, he doesn’t think of things in the way I do so it was a non issue.

RRJR · 02/08/2019 15:41

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newmomof1 · 02/08/2019 15:54

It's more than enough. You're only questioning it because a small amount of presents makes it look like you're not giving much.

The cash isn't weird. My OH specifically wanted cash for his birthday and that he definitely didn't want presents. It's completely normal.

MyDcAreMarvel · 02/08/2019 15:56

Cash in card is bizarre , he isn’t your nephew. The ring is OTT also.

ChristmasFluff · 02/08/2019 15:59

Me and the ex-husband took eachother away for special breaks as our 30ths - short breaks in meaningful places to the person. Don't think we bought presents at all, even though we had plenty of money at the time.

Your presents sound really thoughtful, and that is what matters the most, not the money you spend.

I also think the money in the card sounds weird, but if it's what you do....