I've always had this issue with my DH where he gives his opinion, I listen and then I give my opinion and "I'm turning it all round on him" or making it his fault etc etc. Which I'm not. I just get to explain how I will have felt in a situation after having listened and understood how he felt. I often try and explain that little blips are no ones fault and feel it's often just down to a lack of communication/ misunderstanding. He says things often go my way and that I am controlling. I really try not to be. I often ask his opinion about a particular decision we're making and he says "I don't know/ I don't mind..." and so I will make the decision. Sometimes I've felt STRONGLY about something and have got my own way. But equally if I could sense that he felt very strongly about something I would concede and do something his way. I am all about compromise. Yet he seems to think that I am not. That everything is one way (mine) and that I never listen to him. He gets angry at the kids because they don't listen to him either (they're really little!!! Typical children who don't really benefit from getting barked at!) when I suggest he uses different strategies with the children, such as distraction, making a fun game out of something (eg tidying) etc etc, I am undermining him.
He's been married before and one serious relationship after that and he has told me in past convos that they were controlling too.
Does he have an issue with women?
On the face of it (ie to everyone, he is a lovely calm friendly, polite man). And he has done lots of kind stuff for me. But now it's like he's snapped