Love and fancy DH, but his physical presence can really piss me off... normal?

[BodyOfBrass]

Hello. Just want a view on whether this is normal really.

Been with DH for nearly 20 years. Am 40. 2 kids. Still fancy him; good sex life. Very lucky.

But... the sound/smell/sight of him around the house very quite often makes me feel so... angry.
If I hear him farting, belching, eating loudly, etc., or if he doesn't have a shower every day and therefore smells, I get this bubbling sensation of utter upset/rage like he's invading my space (which he isn't). I try very hard (successfully) to contain it, and basically just absent myself to another part of the house if possible.

Anyone else?

To clarify the contradiction between this and fancying him... basically, wanting to shag him overrides this stuff, when that's on the cards. But obviously that is not the case all the time.

Yes! Very similar age abd time together here, love the bones of the man but omg at times can’t stand being near him?

I think it’s hormonal with me, is it cyclical have you noticed?

I think its normal! I love my husband so much, but christ sometimes when I hear him crunching on food I want to lamp him over the head with a plate of food......

Ugh, yes - the man noises. Love him to bits, just often prefer him silent. Ten times worse now I’m pregnant.

Well, this is a relief. Thanks for the replies and sorry (and glad) to hear you feel my pain...

Yes, definitely a hormonal aspect for me too @RJnomore1. A little scared about what menopause may bring

Isn't that why the man cave was invented? So that you have somewhere to 'banish' them to and they can make all their rude noises there?

I get like this sometimes too. It really annoys me when he’s in my space sometimes. I’m a person who quite likes time alone though so I put it down to this, I feel suffocated easily. And definitely hormonal too.

Do you resent him for anything OP?

Sounds like marriage to me.

My DP likes to sigh. It will be the thing that ends him one day.

Marriage is such a social construct.

I honestly think living together is vastly overrated and often mind numbingly dull after the first few years.

How funny! I’m exactly the same age as you, 2 kids & I together 22 years. Like you I love him & want to be with him, still enjoy sex but sometimes little things he does drives me crackers. I put it down to me getting grumpier, hormonal & less tolerant as I’m getting older & have less time to myself. I didn’t need know this was a thing. Nice to know I’m not alone 😀

Good job a man didnt start a thread about how his little wifey was annoying him so much.....but was happy to have her around to shag occasionally.

Crack on girls.....

You may well have a point, @user1479305498.

As for man caves, @HypatiaCade... I would quite like a woman cave for myself at the bottom of the garden. It will have a small fridge, a sofa and a nice high fence around it.

@SignedUpJust4This, not really. Usual stuff of relationships probably (e.g., doesn't do enough tidying; but nor do I...) but nothing deep or un-aired. I'm just intolerant...

I think pizza was invented to make sure I wasn't blinded to my husband's faults by lust. I sit plotting ways to kill him and hoping he chokes on it every time he eats a thin crust.

@Sunshine196, I'm also delighted to know this is a "thing", perhaps at our age especially.....?

Cereal for me, @Disfordarkchocolate. Aaaaaaaaaaaargh, the sound of granola... (not envy)

Stop buying it and only allow overnight oats and porridge @BodyOfBrass.

@BodyOfBrass don't forget the moat....with man eating critters in it!

This is definitely hormonal for me, I adore my husband until the twom days prior to my period when he absolutely does my head in. I know my feelings are unreasonable and apologise to my husband when it happens, I also voice what is annoying me (I have a glass face as well as being on the Spectrum so I am honest to my detriment) as well as explaining that it is not anything he is doing- purely my hormones. My husband takes it on the chin and buys me lots of chocolate and ice cream in preparation (I love that man so much). He will give me a hug and move to the other end of the house. I used to be the same living at home with my parents, my Dad and my brothers would stay out of my way and my Mum bless her kept me topped up in chocolate supplies (funnily enough the desire for chocolate and ice cream is hormonal too).

I track my cycles and symptoms/ moods on the glow app and it is great for spotting trends in my cycle. Especially as I’m likely peri-menopause (my previously very regular period has been completely irregular for the last year) as sometimes the only way I can predict my cycle is my moods/ symptoms!