Married man

[Stopthisshit]

Ok before everyone starts going off on one I need support
I am in love with a married man. This is not lust or limerance and no nothing has happened
He’s is the love of my life. I have never felt like this before. I am 53 so not young.
He has no idea and has a lovely wife. I would not ever come inbetween their relationship
I have known him years. I love him but can’t have him
I am heart broke

What your username says.

Leave him and his lovely wife alone, go nc, pretend he doesn’t exist...... you’ll get over it!

You need to cut him out of your life and move on, I'm afraid.

You are not in love with him. You have a crush on him. You can't really be in love with someone that you do not have any kind of relationship. Back off before more than one person gets hurt.

You have let your fantasies about this man run away with you. The reality would not match, a family would be in ruins, and you (and him) would feel guilty forever.
He’s off limits but maybe that’s why he’s so appealing? Fantasising about someone you can’t have is easier than trying to actually have a relationship.

So stop seeing him. Duh. 🤷‍♀️

What do you want from this, for the ladies of MN to tell you to confide your feelings in him, to nudge you gently forward to true love and his wife and kids will totes be fine?

You're having at the very least a one-sided emotional affair. Get a hold of yourself FFS and stop seeing this married man.

It's times like this that I'm shocked older people don't learn 😂

You're 53 years old for goodness sake.

You're 53 and still don't know what real love is. I think you should find a good therapist, and I mean this very seriously.

I do know him
I do know what real live is
I will not ruin anything

You're ruining your own life and chance for happiness. You need to go no contact and move on.

Look OP, what genuinely are your intentions?
The only advice you’ll get here is to go no contact, move on, etc
You can’t help how you feel.....ok, but you are in control of your actions.
The right thing for all is to cut this man out

What is missing from your life that he brings to it? Can you get that elsewhere?

Does he love you?

What makes you so sure it’s love, not Limerence?

How do you know him?

Have you ever lived with this man?

Had sex with him?

Picked his dirty socks up from the floor?

Have you ever had to rely on him, completely & utterly and known 100% that he would be there for you?

Does he support you emotionally?

Is he your best friend?

Does he choose to spend time with you above all others?

No, probably not because he is someone else's husband.

You are assuming he'd be this amazing partner for you because your relationship with him is imaginary. If it was real, you may well fall out of "love" with him in seconds because of annoying habits that only a live-in partner would know about or a myriad other reasons.

Back away & focus on someone single. This route will lead no where good for you.

" I have never felt like this before." - because it is a fantasy.

It is not real.