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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

My dad just went to punch me

11 replies

RLEOM · 26/07/2019 17:03

I've had to live with my dad with my baby DD since leaving my ex in January.

He's a stress head, has a bad temper, and has been violent to my mum in the past (she passed away 2 years ago). We had an argument because he was stressing out over me having an extra tub of butter in the fridge, started throwing out my food (I've just finished my statutory maternity pay so I'm skint and in debt), and it escalated from there. He stood up, raised his fist to my face, and then grabbed a bottle of water and threw it at me.

I don't feel safe, more so for my daughter's sake.

Do I go straight to a refuge? Wait for it to blow over, gather my stuff over the next week or so and then leave? He's refused to write me a letter to the council to chuck me out.

I feel so low and lost.

OP posts:
ithinkiammelting · 26/07/2019 17:06

Oh my goodness, you poor thing. Are there any other family members you can talk to, or a friend you can stay with temporarily? You really need to get away from this man.

Whosorrynow · 26/07/2019 17:08

RLEOM, I don't know what specific advice to give you apart from take detailed notes of every incident, contact the police so they can open a case
this is serious and you must prioritize the safety of you and your baby

notsodimwit · 26/07/2019 17:10

Just a big handhold FlowersSad hope someone can come and give you good advice xxxxx

Eekdatingisntfun · 26/07/2019 17:26

Oh I’m so sorry Flowers I don’t know what to advise, but please get out of there. Can you contact women’s aid? I hope you get the help you need soon xx

blackcat86 · 26/07/2019 17:28

Are there any friends or other family you can stay with? You must leave with your DD; you know that already.

ColdAndSad · 26/07/2019 19:59

I don't think you can stay there.

Can you see if you can get a place at a refuge?

You must keep yourself and your baby safe.

Whosorrynow · 27/07/2019 02:38

@RLEOM, how are you doing?
have you been able to find somewhere safe?

blackcat86 · 27/07/2019 06:13

I hope you're safe op. Did you find somewhere to go?

Original poster
RLEOM · 27/07/2019 10:33

Amongst all the tension and silent treatment, I stayed. But I know I need to get out fast. My daughter is at her dad's this weekend, and I'm dreading what's to come. But I aim to pack up my belongings in the next few days and head to a refuge or the council.

OP posts:
Widgetsframe · 27/07/2019 10:41

Can you get a family to mediate and get him to write the letter for the council? He must be unhappy having you there, can it be pitched to him that writing the letter is the way to get his space back?

Atalune · 27/07/2019 10:43

Leave.

Your ex- what’s he like? Can you stay with him for a short time?

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