Should I stay or should I go

[WorkingMule]

For the last 6 months the tension between me and H has increased so bad that we have a row every other day.
It starts with small things: like I don't do enough in the house, can't help him properly with renovating the house, that I say something which he doesn't like the subject.
In the last few weeks he started to shout that he wishes death will take me, to die because of cancer, among other names( lazy, money spender, smelly, fat etc etc)... You get the idea.
Last night DM called to say that she wishes to send us a package, which we will have to pick up from a private courier. My H exploded in a storm of swears and we started to argue again, that I had the nerve to suggest for him to go in his week off to pick it up.
Every-time that this storms happens I think that I will leave, but after a few hours he is sweet again and he is sorry that we argue.He loves our DD to bits..
I don't know what to do! I have cried myself out. I don't want to leave as i don't want my DD to grow-up without a father near her, but on the other hand I don't want her to see all this terrible things. DD loves her daddy very much.

Like all abusive men he does the nice/nasty cycle here and that cycle is a continuous one.

The only acceptable level of abuse in a relationship is none.

What did you learn about relationships when you were growing up, did your dad treat your mum like this?.

What would you tell someone else in this situation?.

You don't want your DD to grow up without a father near her?!. Give yourself a head shake. This is a terrible reason for staying with such an abusive man like your H. You cannot stay because or for the sake of your DD and she is not going to say thanks mum for doing that to her. Is that the main lesson you as her mum want to teach her about relationships?.

You are in an abusive relationship here. Your DD cannot and must not grow up thinking that yes, this is how men treat women. Would you want her to have a relationship like yours is when she is an adult; no you would not. You cannot fully protect her currently from what is happening within your home; she is picking up on all the vibes here both spoken and unspoken.

He can co-parent from a contact center, you will certainly need to formalise all contact arrangements. You and he should not be together any more and the relationship is over anyway because of the abuse. He won't make it at all easy for you to separate from him but your own recovery from his abuse will only properly start when you are apart fully from him. He is your abuser and such men do not ever change, he feels no remorse as well as entitled to act as he does towards you.

Please call Womens Aid, your local domestic violence centre and the Rights of Women organisations here; they can and will help you leave your abusive H. Do not let his abuse of you (and in turn her) be your daughter's legacy.