I'll try time keep this short. A month ago my OH cheated on me (kissed) and left me for the OW. He blamed me for the fact he kissed her, saying that I was "not close to him" (we did everything together and spoke all day when we weren't together) and that I didnt hug or kiss him - I'm not a particularly tactile person which he knew when we got together - but I would show affection in my own way and always hugged/kissed him back when he did.
All his excuses were easy fixes, and I was willing to work through it and work on our relationship but he absolutely would not give. He claims he wants a "spark and a flame" whereas he thought we were like an old married couple (in my eyes we were very comfortable with each other!)
He said some other half hearted excuses such as he "wasnt that happy" which is so non committal that I don't believe it is true as he gave me no indication that he was unhappy. It took him two days to tell me what had happened and I could tell as his tone of message changed so I would have known if he had any issues before then. He used to get up at 6am with me on weekends to come to my hobby with me!
Anyway the point of this post is that I'm finding it so so difficult to deal with, how do you work through it? I cant believe he upped and left just like that (and did this all over text too...) we have a holiday booked and plans for the future. He is now with this OW and all the sparks that come with it and I'm just finding it so hard to process. I can't stop thinking about how much happier he would be now and what a great time they must be having. I was so happy and it's now all gone, and I miss him so much. Before all this he was such a lovely guy, I would never have thought he could do this to me, it's not him at all. Any advice would be appreciated!