Anyone in the same boat???

[HumptyDumpty43]

I need to have a blazing row with my boyfriend and vent a lot of pent up frustrations but once I've said everything I need to say, I know I will feel great for 20 mins and then I'll feel like shit. He is driving me mad on several levels. I'll try to put them in order of annoyance.

1. He never listens to anything I say to the point that I don't think he is remotely interested in anything I do or say anymore. He doesn't ask how my day has been, he doesn't seem to care how I am feeling and recently he was no support when I developed issues in my life where I had to give up work as I was having panic attacks and could no longer cope with leaving my home. This lasted for about 18 months and I dealt with all of this on my own with the help of medication and CBT counselling and am now feeling a lot stronger and able to cope more with day to day life. His response to me having to give up work was that I was lazy and to get another job.
2. He has just come back from a night away with his brother & sister in law and has dropped into the conversation that two other couples went on the do. I didn't go because there wasn't a spare ticket, which I was fine about, but it's the fact that he didn't tell me about the other couples going that has really pissed me off. He's just gone out again for the afternoon which I am overjoyed about as I don't have to speak to him for at least another 4 hours.
3. He keeps farting so loudly that it makes me jump!! He thinks it's funny but it's now starting to really repulse me.
4. He is incapable of shutting and locking the front door whether I am in or out of our home, so it's left wide open so anyone could get in. He doesn't see that it's a problem.
5. I have learnt to cope with his dirty clothes constantly being left all over the place and which are always inside out when I pick them up off the floor to be washed and the loo roll never being replaced. We've been together for 11 years so I'm not going to leave him as I don't want to lose my home. What would you do - I feel as though I can live like this but have I got the right to explode with anger at him or should I just put up with it for an easy life? I'm not unhappy just full of resentment and feel the need to smash something.

Just read your other thread:

You don't trust him, never have
He was looking for no strings attached hook ups
You rarely have sex

Plus all the things pissing you off about him in this thread

Wasn't a spare ticket for the function he attended...yeah right

But you've stated you won't do anything about it so just carry on as you are I guess living a miserable shit life with someone who doesn't give a toss about you.

Did anyone get any of my replies? You're sending them by PM so they won't appear on the thread. I've replied to you by PM anyway

Eleven years is a long time to be putting up with a not good man like this,unless you thought he was much better in the early years. But this is a more than awful situation to be living with,and soul destroying too.

I know that some women will stay with a bad partner for ages, or even forever,but you are important,and this situation probably won't change,and the anger will always be with you. Your partner does not seem like a man,who can talk things through with you,like a dead end situation. I hope you will find some happiness soon,and be able to make changes to your life.

Jeez OP you are actually prepared to put up with all this just to continue living in that home?? I'm afraid the only answer you will get from people on here is 'leave him' or 'kick him out'. He doesn't give a shit about you and he is also doing things to deliberately annoy you including leaving the door open. I would guess he knows its not right to do that (he can't be that stupid) but because it annoys you, he gets some enjoyment from that. Including his vile farting. He is revelling in upsetting you.
Why would you think its ok? He will only get worse - imagine your life with him in another 11 years! frightening.

No support at all!! We jointly own our home so need him to pay half the mortgage

I am out at the moment trying to think straight!! I am going to have to confront him when I get home. He can't be happy either

Thanks!!

Sell the house and move on, you’ve no kids, so walk away.

I ended my 17 year relationship 2 years ago. We had literally just bought a new build house. I couldn't get the mortgage on my own. I still managed to move on with my life though,. There is always a way. Dont use the house as an excuse because that can be sold if neither of you can afford to keep it on.
I'd rather live in a bedsit than with someone like that.

I'd go and grab a couple of plates out of the cupboard and break them this afternoon. Then, whilst picking the pieces up, have a long hard look at what reasons you actually have for not leaving and getting a better life where your crockery doesn't need regular replacement.

OP, I don't understand something. Who paid the bills and mortgage while you weren't working for 18 months? If it was him, he is probably fed up and wants out too. He isn't your husband and can walk out any minute. If you can't support yourself and know you are relying on someone who doesn't like you, then that leaves you vulnerable and must exacerbate your MH issues. This isn't sustainable. You do see that, don't you?
Yiu aren't really together anymore, just co-habiting a space with an angry, resentful man.
Are you working and supporting yourself now? If not, push for a house sale, sort out some accommodation and a low-stress job asap.
There's nothing to stay for.