Circumventing obtaining his consent to adopt

[Lyaness]

I’m getting married later this year and have a 2year old child. My DP has raised my child since he was born as my ex left early on in the pregnancy. Ex hasn’t seen DS through his own choice but does pay maintenance. I’ve asked my ex to give me the requisite consent to allow my DP to adopt our son but he’s refusing.

Is there a way to proceed without his consent? It seems to be it would be in my sons best interest to have a father who is present and willing to look after him rather than an absent father.

Has anyone got any experience of this?

My DD's friend was finally adopted by her step dad on her 16th birthday, she had told the relevant authorities that she wanted it and persuaded her birth father to sign the papers otherwise she would never be in his life (she does see her birth father still twice a year or so her choice but she wanted to be sure her step dad was on her future marriage certificate!)

I want to sever any right my ex has. He really is dangerous man, physically and mentally. I have the mental and physical scars. I don’t want my son to ever experience or witness that.

I am trying my hardest to convince him to consent but he’s refusing at the moment.

I have looked into a residence order but what I really want is to completely and irrevocably sever the tie.

I will speak to my ex and see if I can persuade him.