I don't even know how to start this 'thread'.
I just need advice and I don't really have close friends to talk to about it and it's gotten to the point where I can't talk to my husband about it either which is actually really sad.
Basically, at the start of the year, I had a miscarriage (only family know). My oldest sister (there's a long history but we don't exactly get on but act like we do), she was the only one who wasn't happy for us when we announced our pregnancy and she went on to say that we shouldn't be having any more children in case my partner passes on anything. In her opinion, anyone in the world with a 'condition' shouldn't have children. She also never contacted me when I miscarried, not even a text to say she was sorry to hear what I'd gone through. Just nothing.
I can't even talk to her I'm still so hurt by her that I don't think I can move past it. At the end of the day, she's my sister so I'm not going to cut her out my life or anything dramatic like that but I'm not making effort to have a relationship with her anymore and I just don't feel as strongly or caring towards her anymore. Is that a horrible thing to say?
My ultimate issue is that my partner is of course extremely hurt because her comment was about him. Now his heart condition isn't genetic we checked with his consultant before we even started trying to have children. He wants absolutely nothing to do with her, we can't even have a conversation about it because he gets so angry. He says things like he wouldn't p* on her if she was on fire and to me, that's just taking it too far she's still my sister at the end of the day.
Am I justified in having a huge family fall out over what she said and how she acted? Because everyone else is acting as though we should just move on from it and act like it didn't happen. But I can't just do that she hasn't apologised. This is typical behaviour from her and everyone goes 'but you know what Natalie's like' as if that makes it ok. No one ever expects anything from her we've always got to be the 'bigger person' but why. She's the oldest sister it should be her making the moves to sort the situation but she's not. Somehow she's manipulated everyone to her side as usual.
If you're still reading, thank you for sticking with me I'm sure half of it doesn't make sense. It's hard to explain a situation without it turning into an essay! I just don't know what to do! Because now my anxiety is back, I'm having trouble sleeping, and issues with my husband over it so we just try to ignore it but is that really the best thing?