I have been married for 8 years, with my partner for 10 years. I have 1 DD 20 months old and am 20 weeks pregnant with another. I am alone in the UK - all my family live abroad, a 24 hour flight away. But I do have a reasonable friendship support network - though none with spare bedrooms. I have been agonising about my relationship with my partner FOR YEARS - and more recently wondering why couples counselling isn't working, though there have been periods where I thought we were coming through to the otherside and things were better. There have been a number of raging episodes by my husband this past month - with him being totally unbalanced and unreasonable to very minor issues.
I have just bought and skim read Lundy Bancroft's 'Why does he do that' book - and had the epiphany that I am in a totally emotionally abusive relationship, nothing will change, and I need to get out.
But how? Where do I start? What first steps should I take?
My husband will never leave the marital home, so I think this is the first step. I only work 3 days a week and live in London, and am so worried about how I will financially manage. Where do I even go?
Do you have any advice? When you have escaped a relationship / marriage with very young children, how did you do it and what steps did you take? I feel totally overwhelmed but resolved that if I don't get out now, I will be in exactly the same position in years to come, and I will remain the shadow of myself I have become the past 8.5 years.