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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Am I going mad or is this a possibility that he’s stalking me in some way

32 replies

Littleteacup1 · 30/06/2019 23:05

Partner of 3 years and I live together we own a house and things have currently been very up and down. He works with computers for a living and is very clever with what he does to the point I’ve joked about him beeing able to hack people and he’s always said with some apps like snap chat and tinder it used to be so easy due to all the bugs and leaks they had but I never thought much of it. When I first met him we where just friends he really liked me and I wasn’t ready yet for comitment made it clear and carried on dating. The thing is he new most the dates I was on claimed he worked with one of the guys at the time on his work website I looked at the about us page where they had a list of all the staff not one guy I recognised that I was talking to. He managed to find out about 3 of the guys that I slept with apparently they told him as he new them both guys denied knowing him and his reply was why would they say if they had told me. He also used to drink with work most nights and would always bumb into me on dates but I juts assumed it was because of small town. I never really thought all this through and joined the dots untill recently when a few things have been said that only I would know. On Sunday after a bit of an argument I said I may go Out to dinner with friend turned out she was still on holiday. I then text his friend / our friend [ they where friends for a long time until ny partner gave up with him and stopped making effort] that any chance of a bbq this evening would be off due to partner being grumpy he then asked if I was ok And did I want to meat him for a McDonald’s. I said yes would be lovely will see you later. Left the house in an Uber which was from around the side of the house not wear he could see it as Uber just pulled into a spare spot and off I went. 2 days later he claims I lied to him about who I was going to meet I said what do you mean he was like you got an Uber and had a McDonald’s with our friend he claims he just guessed McDonald’s but a I hardly go there and where I went there is at least five other options and he then claims he saw me get in the Uber. He also said I knew my friend was on holiday and that I was never going to meet her. He was the one that introduced me to his friend and insisted we hang out as he was getting fed up of being asked daily to hang out with friend and I was always getting bored while he worked so much. I feel like he knows way to much have arranged to see friend tomorrow who also works with computers and he’s going to help me re set and sort my phone out and see if he can work anything out

OP posts:
newmomof1 · 02/07/2019 00:35

@Littleteacup1 yes it can change...
Don't wait 3 months before leaving this psycho...

TeaForTheWin · 02/07/2019 00:38

Yeah, if you're living with a nutjob I cant see what you would prioritise over getting the hell out of there asap.

Littleteacup1 · 02/07/2019 07:06

I don’t have an option I have no job at the moment no we’re to go to my partner has no we’re to go to he’s going to move into spare room

OP posts:
Littleteacup1 · 03/07/2019 11:16

Just the reality of him going is upseting me now it’s all sunk in that the guy who I loved for 3 years isn’t who I thought he was and how I’m going to have to let friends and family no that my so called perfect relationship isn’t wht they thought

OP posts:
SavingSpaces2019 · 03/07/2019 13:08

I’m going to have to let friends and family no that my so called perfect relationship isn’t what they thought
So you DO have somewhere to go?!
It's not like you've got a job keeping you here so stop making excuses and LEAVE.
He's only going to increase his stalking and spying of you now that you've split.

OurChristmasMiracle · 03/07/2019 13:49

You need to leave. He’s still under the same roof as you which means you are not safe. Even if you take all Steps to remove any possibility of him tracking you via phone or laptop what do you think could happen when he realises this?- he will of lost his hold on you and he could do anything

Honestly get yourself somewhere safe NOW

SavingSpaces2019 · 03/07/2019 15:20

He sounds like the kind of guy who would set up spy cameras in your house and watch you in the bathroom/bedroom etc.

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