Advice about telling kids I'm seeing someone

[beachwoodsmoon]

I need wise advice....

I have been seeing someone for a year, I have three kids, and we see one another when the kids are with their dad. We would like to see each other more, but I don't even know how to broach the subject with my kids! Do I have a 'friend' or do I say I am seeing someone and I would like them to meet?

How old are the kids?

How old are your kids? After a certain age they'll just assume he's your boyfriend.

As a general rule, go with honesty and make it clear that it's romantic. Kids don't like being mislead any more than adults.

7, 12, 16

This is my first relationship since their dad left, we've never even discussed that one day I will be in a new relationship

I think it depends on their age, if under 8 years then I would just introduce him a friend at first. If older then they won’t fall for the friend thing 🤣.

Im always pretty open with my kids but then they are teens and nothing gets past them.

Tell the truth.

Just tell them that you’ve met someone you like and would really like to introduce him. Give them some time to absorb that and ask questions about him. Make sure they know he is not a ‘step dad’ or anything like that (yet) but simply mums-boyfriend. Then introduce them slowly and without too much pressure. You know your kids best though, you might need to tailor the approach depending on their general personalities and attitude to your break up. Maybe tell the eldest alone first or the eldest two together because the impact and reaction from them will likely be very different to the youngest.

I just want them to know about him so he can call in for coffee or go for a walk etc. Nothing too heavy.

Just be honest. Say you've got a boyfriend, he's very special. You've been seeing him for a while and you would like to bring him home.