30w pregnant, feeling worthless and insecure. Advice please??

[FTM05xx]

Long post I'm Sorry! Pregnant and feeling so worthless and stupid...

Me and my partner haven't been together very long, we met in 2019 in July and I'm not 30w pregnant with his child, we are childhood friends and I didn't expect to ever see this guy again but we rekindled and magically and unexpectedly this little bundle of joy appeared🤗 I was told for years that they thought I was infertile so having a baby girl is a dream come true..

Anyways; thus pregnancy hasn't been the easiest I've been diagnosed with SPD OR PGP, I have to have growth scans every two weeks bevause baby is a little one the small side, I've had a few hospital admissions due to infections ect, So it's been stressful and a little bit frightening..

My partner works Monday-Friday but he's only had this job a month and I literally don't hear the end of it, how tired he is constantly and that I do nothing and should be grateful that he works and brings money in... he wanted to move in with me and go legal ect, now he throws up he brings the money in and that I wouldn't be able to do this alone ect, he is not supportive and makes me stressed constantly.
He makes me feel insecure and stupid, he makes me feel crazy on times and he really plays with my emotions.... for example, tonight is 2:18am in the morning and I am sooo tired and aching all over and because i was fed up in bed, he woke up and had a go at me... made me feel guilty because he's got work tomorrow, So I grabbed my pillow and a blanket and said I'd go downstairs, he then shouted at me 'you're fu**ing pregnant' to which I replied... yes and that's why im struggling to sleep, he's made me feel so bad that I don't even want to go back to bed but I'm uncomfortable even more so down here, oh well 3 more hours and he will be up for work and hopefully I can go back to bed then.

I don't know why he's so nasty to me :(

That sounds awful, he needs to be supporting you. Have you anywhere else you can go? It would be easier to be on your own than with this horrible person?

This is my house, I own it... he just lives with me... I know I could ask him to leave but I'm so drained with everything atm that I haven't got the head to do it all tidy and he'd end up twisting it back on me again.

I just want to feel supported, like I said its early hours in the morning here.. I want to go to bed but scared he will shout at me again and I'm feeling vunerable. Xx

When you say you were 'fed up in bed' what do you mean? Did you wake him up to tell him about it?

-@WantedAChatterbox

truthfully I was moving around a lot, trying to get comfortable and not squash my big belly... and I was sighing and getting flustered and he turned around and said 'what's wrong? You're keeping me up! So I told him and I grabbed my pillow and said I'm going to go down stairs for a little while and he said 'you're fuc**ng pregnant and you've kept me up for hours I got work tomorrow' he contradicts himself all the time😏 my sleep has been bad for a few weeks now and I haven't woken him up once not even on accident, but tonight I am so drained and emotionally and physically tired I just can't hide how I feel

It would be easier on your own than dealing with a man who does not support you. When your baby arrives it will get harder so you do not need the added stress of someone who makes you feel so bad. You will be amazed at how well you will cope when away from a toxic relationship. Take it from someone who has been there. I went it alone when my oldest were 1 and 2 their dad has never paid a penny for them and has seen them once when they were 2 and 3. I had a small council flat at the time. Since then I now own my own home have a successful career and 2 happy teenagers and eventually I met someone else and have another son. Pack this man's bags put him out have a nice long bath get into your own bed and you will be fine. This is a time to relax and enjoy the anticipation of becoming a mum.

Yup, I would agree with all of this. If it’s your house then he can either shape up and start looking after you, or start looking for s new place to live. The way he is treating you is totally unacceptable. Please don’t put up with it

I'm not sure if you are passive most of the time? Is this possibly a reason he treats you badly; because he thinks he can.?

You are not stupid or worthless. You are so going to have an extra special purpose in being a another.

I would recommend some counselling on your self esteem. I'd also be telling him that respect is a normal part of a y relationship and if be can't be respectful (to the mother of his child!!) then he can go .

If he's not treating you right, make plans s to end this. You and your baby do t need him. He can pay for his child but don't feel like you owe him a roof over his head.