Checking his phone

[Cait2019]

Background on us first- we have had a I suppose u would call it a FWB relationship (rules - no sleeping with anyone else - and we see each other at least 3-4 times a week) it works! Or so I thought- I have done something I always said I would never do - I checked his phone!

The reason a text popped u and it just didn’t sit well - so when he was sleeping I read the texts!

They where what I thought- a lot of sex talk what they wanted to do to each other - photos/video have been exchanged- as I read down I realised they have meet! I know what i should do - but I love what we have. But this is spinning my head. You see the messages are from another man! How do I compete with a man? How do I tell him I know without telling him I checked his phone......

Totally confused.....anyone been in a similar position?

You don’t compete. You aren’t competing. You’re FWB. Not exclusive

we have had a I suppose u would call it a FWB relationship (rules - no sleeping with anyone else - and we see each other at least 3-4 times a week) it works

It doesn't work. You are emotionally involved with a man who just wants a guaranteed shag.

End it.

Well you said you aren't exclusive, so he can do what he wants with whoever he wants, so can you.
If Fwb isn't what you want leave and get a real relationship instead

OP - I have never heard of exclusives FWB arrangements. They may be so by circumstances but very unlikely to work where there is an ‘agreement’ like you mention....
And 3-4 times a week is quite intense - it’s what people in relationships do....

So - not sure what it is you are looking for here. You need to shake yourself and realise that:

• you are NOT in a relationship...
• and you aren’t competing with another man over this man, since See point 1 above....

This man is not doing anything wrong - he is just enjoying his - as it seems - very active and busy social schedule...

On another note - I do hope you are very careful with protection.
Statistically - given his life style - he is a higher risk for various STDs - and you need to be smart.

not sure what it is you are looking for here

Stories.

End it and get an STI check.

This is made up...

Oh chinny reckon....

Surely an "exclusive FWB" who you see 3/4 times a week is a relationship? I'm struggling to see the difference if not.

How do I compete with a man?
Why the fuck do you want to compete?

If you're not allowed to sleep with anyone else then it's not FWB it's a relationship, surely?

That’s one of the benefits of being fwb, he can meet other people, as can you.
That’s how fwb works, don’t get all upset that your fwb is enjoying all the benefits!

3-4 times a week?? That's 2-3 times a week more than I would want to see a boyfriend!

And an exclusive FWB is a paradox. The whole point is that there are no expectations or emotional attachments beyond friendship.

You arent FWB

But you arent in a relationship either

You dont need to compete. Just get rid.

Not made up!