Partner on escort site

[Newmama123]

I need some advice. I have nobody to turn to and I am at a loss. My partner of 6 years is forever putting his toxic friend before our relationship. I thought things might change when I became pregnant but they haven't. Its not unusual for him to stay out all night without so much as a text. I am now 30 weeks. He seems to have little interest in me and we haven't had sex in I don't know how long. After his latest stint of staying out I went through his phone. His internet history showed pornhub as recent but worse was a site called Adultworks. Which appears to be an escort agency, this is saved to his favourites aswell so obviously a frequent user. Does this explain why he doesn't come near me? I can't tell him I know. This is eating me up. I have nowhere else to go and I want my son to have the best start.

It’s just typical Mumsnet rubbish OP, people slinging in unwarranted comments without even reading the thread properly or making up stuff to suit their own agendas or just leaping to very random conclusions. Ignore it. Hope you find a way to get through this, must be heartbreaking.

I honestly think it's worth talking to him about it otherwise it's going to drag on and you're going to get more worked up about it and it's not good for you or the baby. If you haven't spoken for a while that's not a nice living situation and you want to get it sorted before the baby is born as that's a time that you should enjoy and not have this worry hanging over you. You may not hear what you want to hear when you talk to him but atleast you'll know where you both stand. Even though I don't agree with him looking at escort sites, doesn't mean he has cheated, I think its definitely something that needs to be talked about sooner rather than later. Not nice for you though and I hope you cant sort this out for you and the baby's sake x

Sorry was meant to say hope you can sort this out!

Your son is never going to have the best start with someone who behaves like this OP.

I'm not really sure what the purpose of confronting him would be unless you want to want to be comforted by a lie.

He's always been this person, the difference is that now he thinks you're trapped he feels comfortable to show his true colours.

@jess8888 fuck off

You must feel so vulnerable and I am sorry that you are going through this.

I would definitely get rid of him, these types don’t change. There are an abundance of married men, just like this, so I agree with you, that is an amusing comment. Presumably, the commenter was saying that you could get more money in the event of a divorce.

The way he has treated you during what should be a wonderful time, is unforgivable in my opinion.
I guarantee you could do so much better than him.
The love between mother and child is the most beautiful thing, don’t let a sex obsessed man ruin this special time for you. He doesn’t deserve to be a father.

Get help and support to get out, so that you can enjoy your new baby.

OP, ignore the people on this thread who are making it out like you did anything to deserve this. There has been such a big increase in victim blaming on MN recently. Let me tell you straight, you did NOTHING to make this happen.

This is your partners problem, he chose to lie to you and be unfaithful after getting you pregnant. Its HIS responsibility to keep his dick in his pants and respect and support the mother of his child, the problem is he's an utter selfish bastard that HE chose not to do this.

I know this isn't the most ideal situation as not many of us plan to be single parents but I promise you that being a single parent is infinitely better than raising children with a wanker. He will destroy you if you stay and then you will only ever be able to be half a person which will affect your ability to parent. You and your baby will be just fine on your own. I know it feels embarrassing to reach out but your loved ones would rather be there to support you and the only person they will judge is him. This has no bearing on your character, you have done nothing wrong but fall in love with the wrong man (which so many of us do so it's nothing to be ashamed of).