Good for a fuck but not much else

[RelateOrNot]

Urgh! What sort of man says this? My “d”p that’s who.

He, who has now apparently lost his libido since falling in love with me and is fine about it. Because he wants “more in a relationship than sex” and was getting fed up of girls who are “good for a fuck but not much else”. And, to make things worse, he thinks it’s a compliment to me!

I’m reeling at the revelation that it’s either love OR sex for him, and starting to think he has a Madonna/Whore complex.

I’m actually going to give my first LTB....to myself!

Sorry for the rant. Really needed to get it off my chest.

I hope you didn't invest too much time and effort into him and you're ok

2 years that I won’t get back. Decent sex life for the first 6 months then dwindled down to once a month if I’m lucky, never initiated by him. Yet he was like a “dog on heat” (his words) with his ex. Charming! Frankly I should have left as soon as he said that. Am feeling like an idiot for trying to make it work

Don't ever feel like an idiot for giving something your best shot. We all want to believe the best in someone.

He's probably lying about the ex. He's probably like this with all women. You can't save him, save yourself.

My understanding is that men like this can only fuck women they have no respect for. It's ugly and demeaning.

He thinks it's a compliment because not wanting to fuck you proves to him that he respects and cares for you. It's just as you said - the Madonna/Whore complex. Makes me feel yuck

Very disappointing for you but you really don't have a choice. He's got to go.

Oh, gross. How charming that's how he sees women.

How old is he? Could he be having performance issues?

He’s early forties and he hasn’t show any signs of ed, more that he doesn’t seem very interested in sex. I’m pretty sure that he still has quite an active sex life with his right hand.

Yea cut this one loose. What a horrible way to speak about women. If my dh said that I’d be horrified. It’s the whole attitude towards women that goes along with it.
Don’t see 2 years as a waste either, take what you’ve learned and move on happily into whatever the future has in store for you without this horrible twat.
Good luck.

It sound like a possible performance issue, perhaps not virile as he used to be. Old age doesn’t come on it’s own and his right hand is probably a lot easier to satisfy than a real woman.

Perhaps a trip to the chemist for the little blue pills are in order.

I do agree with TheBogWitch that his handling of issue isn’t great. Only you know about your relationship and if it worth trying to save.

More then likely just prefers porn. Another sad lazy looser who prioritizes his phone screen over a real life woman.

I'm very sorry. It can be blindsiding when someone reveals their true nature in an offhand way.

That’s such a wretched way to refer to another human being. LTB.

There are better men out there to be found than that guy. It's a blessing that you have split from him. And I bet he'll come crawling back.

A very unpleasant way to speak about women indeed. Sounds very immature... not a comment I'd expect from a man his age...or any decent man really.

I'm seeing the Madonna/whore complex too.

It's sometimes a cover up when they have performance issues, but the male ego can't get to grips with it.

You're not satisfied with it, so you need to end it.

I’m actually going to give my first LTB....to myself!
I've not been on MN that long but, surely this decision by on OP, is a first?

Congratulations on your clear sightedness OP and hope you have a sunny future! 😎

Lying about his ex for sure, to make you feel like the issue is you.

Yes, LTB! 💪

Madonna whore complex and a disrespectful imbacile to boot.

Run for thr hills OP!!!!

As I read the first two lines I was already thinking "Madonna/whore complex, god what a cliche"

It's fucking 2019. If this sad sack hasn't managed to comprehend that women are people by now, he's never going to do it.

You know you need to LTB - what support do you need to do it?

When someone shows you who they are, believe them.

You know your worth. Good luck for the future.

Thanks RiversDisguise that’s really insightful and exactly how I feel right now.

It’s like the rose tinted specs have come off and I’m seeing a controlling, arrogant, misogynist in front of me. A far cry from the lovely, generous man I fell in love with. I can even pinpoint the moment he changed which was when I agreed to be in an exclusive relationship. Bam! Out went the sex and in came the laziness. I think he wants a mother, not a lover.