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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Depression/Anxiety and separation

2 replies

Arran2013 · 18/06/2019 10:10

Hello all, I'm seeking people's experiences here, for comparison to my own, although no 2 situations are the same.

My story in a nutshell - We are a typical family of 4, two young kids under 6. Married for 4 years. I work full time, pay for most of everything. My wife runs the house and kids, school runs etc, and does part time work from home. Both crazy busy. I'm a doting dad, and would do anything for my kids. I do my share of house work plus more. My wife works hard, but stuck in and around the house. We have next to no time together as husband and wife. She has told me she wants to separate. I'm devastated. No cheating has taken place. I think the stresses of modern life has taken it's toll.

Just last weekend she was out, had too much to drink and said to her friend she had enough and wanted to kill herself. The drink talking, however indication of where her head is at. She has since got help.from the doctor.
She has been depressed and anxious for some time, which I believe has played a big part in this situation.

I'm trying to help her get better. Things are not great however we have the foundations of a solid family, trust, respect. The love part is a grey area. My focus is trying to get her better, for her sake and the family. Our 2 beautiful kids will take the brunt of things don't get sorted.

Just want to hear from anyone who has experienced similar, and did things improve when help was found for depression? I'm clutching onto hope that I can save this.

Please be nice back to me, my heart is very fragile.

Thanks

OP posts:
Lozzerbmc · 18/06/2019 10:23

Sorry to hear this its horrible i know. Had your wife raised this with you before? Why is the love bit a grey area? Can you go away for a weekend and leave kids with grandparents so you have some time and space to talk things over?

Jackit2013 · 18/06/2019 10:37

She had raised it before, but I hadn't appreciated how severe it was. I've had depression in the past, I should have realised the signs.

The love. I love her. Im not sure she loves me, she is confused when I ask her.

And going away together - she is against it. It's like she is past caring for the relationship. I'm confused as I've done nothing but work for the goodness of the family, be it in my job or being there for my kids and wife

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