New partner, new house - claim on equity?

[Provincialbelle]

Hi all, advice for my DB please, as I’m concerned for him.

He is separating from his DW, they have 2 daughters in their early teens. They are selling their house and he is getting 40% of the equity which he is using to buy his own place. The girls will live primarily with their mum but stay at his weekends/ad hoc as arranged.

My concern is that he has a new partner. He has known her for years but it only moved further when his marriage had ended. She is not working due to stress / MH issues but is doing some courses and looking after her elderly DM. She is going to move into his new house and is constantly talking about “their” lovely home and how she can’t wait to “invest” in the house - by doing diy etc. She won’t be on the deeds and won’t be paying any contribution to mortgage or rent/board, as he says he doesn’t want it. He thinks that his equity is therefore safe and if anything happens she will have no claim on the house. I am worried on his behalf. He is a painfully trusting man who was taken for a major ride financially by his STBXW, although at least he is leaving the marriage with some money from the house. Should he get an agreement in writing from his new partner? Or is the fact that she won’t make any contribution beyond food enough to secure his position.

Probably but he should be explicit with her and yes in writing. His solicitor can do something that she signs confirming she has no interest in the property.

But what is he going to do if it ends. Just throw her out. She has no income and health problems, where will she go. He needs to ensure she has an exit plan. Well she does really but my advice would be to not rush into this. It is too fast too soon and she will be an issue for him.

She won't have any claim whilst they are unmarried.

She would have very little claim if she is not on the deeds and they are not married.

Though she may well want to get married quite quickly.

From DB part this is probably a rebound

Agree it’s likely to be a rebound and also echo the other PPs in thinking he should get legal advice and a letter / agreement in place.

I would push it as being as much for her benefit (so she’s clear on what basis she’s leaving her current accommodations / giving up any security attached to where she currently lives) as for his. It’s really not fair on her (as much as on him) to be wishy washy about this.

Thanks to all for responses.

There’s a bit of a rebound aspect but they do seem happy together. Currently she’s living with her DM so that would be her exit plan. She will also inherit her DM house and so she will have a valuable asset then - though it’s unlikely to be worth as much as DB house and she doesn’t have his earning capacity (he has a solid career though not a massively high earner, he is certainly able to give his children a good upbringing which is obviously his priority). He has repeatedly said that he wants nothing from her financially. But she is clearly very keen to feel that she is living in her house not just living in his if that makes sense, and that’s what worries me.

I think she would only have rights if they split and she could prove she'd financially contributed, but I'm not 100% sure.

I'd definitely get a written contract that states she is not entitled to anything, should they split. Otherwise she could argue she's invested time into increasing the value of the house and may be able to swindle something that way.

Possibly he can be upfront and say it will be kids house if ever something happens to him🤷🏻‍♀️
If this is even remotely a rebound relationship he needs to secure himself and his kids. This may not go down well.. however if she is a carer for her mum and has mental health issues she could see this as getting freedom but security as well ..

The relationship is in its early stages ... he needs to just halt her expectations until he is divorced and more settled mentally emotionally and financially .. the place one gets to when all the drama and stress eases and life moves on .. 🌷

Thanks both, yes all very sound advice. I think she genuinely does love DB but at the same time wants to secure herself and feel she is an equal partner when the reality is that she is not equal when it comes to the house. He is buying it with his life savings, she is contributing no money at all, either up front or ongoing. I fear that he is once again being trusting or not wanting confrontation / implied mistrust which is how she’d make him feel if there was a signed contract. His will states that everything goes to his kids and I know he won’t be changing that.

why is he moving her in so soon?
The kids deserve to get settled into seeing their dad/other new home before having a gf/step mum foisted onto them.
The gf will probably be calling herself SM, she sounds the type.

He needs to take time by himself to sort his head and life out, moving his gf in isn't the answer.
Would he be prepared to get a document drawn up for her to sign so it's clear that she won't get any equity/claim?

I think if she argues about signing a contract that should ring alarm bells. They could even include a clause saying if they were to get married, the contract would become null and void, or something similar.

It's fine that his will says everything goes to his kids, but they could split long before then, and even if they don't, she could contest the will (especially if he wrote it before they got together because she could say he just never got round to updating it).

Good advice, thanks. Very good point about the kids. They need to adjust to the change of situation and it will be a bit intense if all of a sudden there is a new parent appearing on top of it all. And they may think she was responsible for the split (she wasn’t) if she is an immediate replacement.

I just hope that he doesn’t proceed on hope without protecting himself and the children.