Do you ever get over estrangement?

[BlueTshirt]

I had to leave my entire family of origin because they weren't healthy to be around. I've paid the highest price for this. Decades of living without extended family to visit in the holidays/chat on the phone/send & receive cards, anything really. I have an ache that seems it will never go away. I reminisce about the old house we used to live in. I am very sad about it. I was unlucky with my family. Some people have nice mums, dads, aunties & uncles. I have no one.

The pain gets tolerable but I’m
Afraid there’s always moments. You just have to weigh up the good and bad and looks like you did and the bad was too much

Also sorry to hear about this. Do you have friends/partner?

I have friends, no partner.

If cutting ties with your family is what you really need to do then continue with that but build a good life for yourself, you can do this

You learn to live with it.

I’m three years on from sibling estrangement, and I feel okay about it finally but have nightmares about him most weeks. Interspersed with awful dreams where we’re making up and rectifying things. It’s a unique grief as there’s never any ‘end’.

I am in the same boat as you OP for similar reasons. It was the best and has been the best thing to do in that situation and it has been a few years now. I dont know that it ever goes away.. I feel a mixture of sadness at times, a bit resentful, toward them for depriving me of a family to spend time with, support and have support from, love and be loved, etc and toward people who have loving, supportive families (which then makes me feel guilty cause it's not their fault, I was just unlucky).
I think its just something you live with and just try to make the best of. I have found nice friends that I can spend time with and are a bit like family for my son (single parent) and that helps, having genuine healthy relationships. It sucks so much though! Sending a hand hold from someone in a similar position.