Lazy boyfriend is driving me mad!?

[Germanshepherdlover]

Me and my boyfriend have been together for 6 years, we have a 4 year old together, but he's so lazy!! He doesn't clean, unless I ask him to, He will let the house stink before he cleans, I do 80% of the cleaning, he doesnt work, I've told him multiple times to get a job, I'm sick of us having no money, he doesn't want me to work or go back to college, if I tell him I've applied for college, he will make me feel uncomfortable.. he barely plays with our daughter, he never takes her out, I want him to have father, daughter days but I have to ask, he sees playing with our daughter as a chore, if I ask him to bath her, he complains and he doesn't bath for days on end sometimes, I'm at the end of my tether with him but I'm scared of being alone. At this point in my life, I'm done, I want better for myself and child but I'm feeling stuck and scared. What do I do?

The person you share your life with is a partner, someone to support you and you support them. He's a waste of space who will never grow up. Please find a way to leave there are lots of lovely men who would be lucky to share their life with you. Don't waste it with this loser

You're basically a single mum right now anyway. A single mum to 2 children by the sounds of things, so cut the dead weight and LTB!

how long has he been not working. is it a recent thing and he's going to look soon. does he know how shameful it is to be a lazy shit.

I agree with all of the above.. and yes you are already a single Mum

But you are a single mum. What would you struggle to do without him every day? What does he actually do? Hands on stuff and parenting? You have already answered this - he does nothing. You are a single parent already he isnt involved.
I don't know your living arrangements but either kick him out or leave him. You and your daughter deserve better. Time for you to take control over your future and your childs future. You cant change him. He will always be a loser.

Honestly, I know it is daunting but don't let the fear of being alone stop you. You will regret it if you stay and waste more of your life on this loser. Your daughter, you, deserve better. Leaving in your 20's is far better than your 40's.

Also, if you want to work or go back to college - do it! You can better your own life.

Go! Good luck.

FFS, get rid of him! Just get him out. He's not contributing anything positive to your life or your DD's life, and I would say he's actively making it harder for both of you to thrive.

Kick him out. Tell him you're through and kick him out.

It's 30 years on for me and he's still a useless waster. We'll be paying rent for ever and never have a decent standard of living. We'll eventually have to move to a one bedroom because of bedroom tax when I stop working at 67.

When he has worked it was 'his money' the pub was the priority and we saw very little practical help. Now he's not working he does nothing all day unless asked. If he does anything it's always to cock so he doesn't get asked again.

I can't stand being in the same room as him - never mind bedroom. The resentment I feel is hurting me but there's nothing I can do to get out. Last week, before pay day, I had £20 to my name. That's it - no savings, assets, treasure and I work full time in a good job.

He used to call my college course my hobby and complained about having to look after his child. I got the good job because of my qualifications. He's a scrounger (better off on the dole type).

I wish I'd done something about it when I was younger.

@tararabumdeay it’s never too late.

God this was my ex he did nothing and I mean nothing for us
Him leaving and sponging off the next girl was the best thing he ever did
Yes I was on my own with 5 kids but it made me so much stronger,the kids where happier and I grew as a person
I look back and wonder why I put up with him
Please take baby steps,go easy on yourself and take it a day at a time-I promise it does get better and you’ll be so much happier

I'm at the end of my tether with him but I'm scared of being alone

You already are alone

@ tararabumdeay

I hope you'd consider getting rid of him. At lease you'd have some peace and not be burdened with his uselessness.

We live on benefits as of now, but we cant afford anything, and he expects me to pay for his gaming habits

Out of what-your child benefit?!

He is a toxic drain on you financially, physically and emotionally. You virtually are a single parent now.

Being a single mum is 100000% better than living with a man like this. I swear.

Robin Williams once said: "I used to think that the worst thing in life was to end up alone. It's not. The worst thing in life is to end up with people who make you feel alone."

This is so true OP. There's nowhere lonelier than a bad relationship.

I'm currently pregnant and single. I know it's not the same as actually having the child here, but I can say I don't feel lonely at all. I know that if I was with a useless partner I would do.

He sounds like an absolute loser to me hun and def sound like you would be better off without him. But if that isn't something you want then stop enabling this unacceptable behaviour before your child starts to learn it too.

You chose to bred with this lazy, scruffy twat. Why do you expect him to change now?

You say you haven't left him because you don't want to be on your own, surely being on your own is better than letting your child think this is normal for adults to not work and not bath and just stay inside the house all day? Do better for your child and make him leave. Dont allow your child to grow up thinking this is a normal environment for grown ups to live in.

Poor you it must be a nightmare - I honestly don't know how you manage to live with such a complete waste of space.
Get rid of him as soon as possible and go to college - it will be So worth it for you.
You have to do practically everything yourself anyway and it will be so much easier than banging your head against a brick wall constantly trying to push water up hill.
Good luck you will be fine.