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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Should I even reach out after the breakup?

4 replies

Joel4eva · 06/06/2019 00:58

My boyfriend and I were together for 5 months but knew each other for well over a year. He’s been a good to me, we planned things for our future together. We’ve had bumps in the road but progressed. I was in an accident almost 3 months ago, and was in the hospital for almost 2 months for spinal damage. Prior to the accident my boyfriend and sister I had a breakup over the most silliest thing, and we even both owned up to our fault in the manner but backed off.
After being released from the hospital I ended up back days later and during this time found out I would need surgery. Long story short, I was wrongfully prescribed 2 antidepressants by my neurologist, who instead shouldve given mild painkillers. Those who know me, know that I’m fiery, but levelheaded and playful. The day I came from the hospital, I took the meds unknowingly and from then on I was flipping out on everyone, and that’s not me. I came to my bf house flipping out, blew his phone up for days, til he broke up with me. It wasn’t just him, my best friend, sister, etc. Weeks later at my surgery prep, the surgeon caught on that I was confrontational and anxious so he questioned my meds. That’s when they figured out the med error and put me on an IV to dilute the meds and when I woke up i felt at ease, less anxious and myself again. But it clicked why I was so anxious, confrontational, not even sleeping, obsessive. Because of these meds, but now my bf wants nothing to do with me. He said he never wanted to speak again and I said so much bs to him, but how do I genuinely apologize and explain to him what happened after him saying he’s done?

OP posts:
Fantababy · 06/06/2019 01:21

Try writing him a letter, explaining exactly what happened. That way he can read it (or not) in his own time. Indicate that you'd be keen to hear from him again but that you'll leave it if not.
The problem is that he may think that you believe all that you said to him, and the drugs just gave you the freedom to express it.

Joel4eva · 06/06/2019 02:08

Hey Fanta! I pray that he doesn’t think that of me, but I’m prepared to let him go even though it hurts, if he stands tall on what he thinks of me now.

OP posts:
ShatnersWig · 06/06/2019 08:12

Let him and it go.

You'd only been together 5 months (knowing him longer socially is neither here nor there) yet you say in that time you had "bumps in the road" and in the first two months had a break up over the most silliest thing.

I appreciate you had an accident and an extreme response to some anti depressants but the first months should all be fun, hearts and flowers, excitement.

You've had bumps in the road and he was on the receiving end of some very bizarre behaviour - even if there is a medical reason, at five months in, it would put most people off, sorry.

sincethereis · 06/06/2019 08:24

don’t.

you into dated for 5 months and already had problems

he experienced weird af behaviour from you, at 5 months you can’t really come back from that

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