We are probably done with after many problems over the years and ironically in other ways, he is very insular and out for himself. Yet so terribly suffocating at the same time.
Today, he made me a sandwich, I ate half then went to deal with DCs, I wasn't particularly hungry. He followed me around with the sandwich in his hand for me to eat. After 5 minutes of him not getting it, I told him I'd had enough of the sandwich.
He watches me through the window when reversing out of the drive (obsessed with me not scratching the car on the bushes).
He is loud and constantly making a noise- loud singing, whistling, wittering about rubbish, asking mundane questions. Never stops talking. We recently has friends over and he kept interrupting my conversations to ask me really annoying questions.
His body is large and loud, he stands right over me when speaking and I find myself constantly moving backwards whilst he edges forwards. He crashes around. He needs large spaces to feel comfortable- I used to live in a small terraced house when dating and he hated it as he said it was too small for him to move around in. I laughed at the time but completely get it now.
In bed he never stops fidgeting.
He's untidy and his clothes are always on the floor.
He makes no effort to connect on an emotional level but asks intrusive questions about how much things have cost me, who was I talking to on the phone etc.
I feel so suffocated, how can I take care of myself whilst feeling so smothered and yet so alone all at the same time? Our emotional/ romantic connection has gone.