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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

My partner told me he has depression, can we be happy?

2 replies

Feelinglost95 · 29/05/2019 09:02

Two weeks ago my boyfriend of 4 years told me he's had depression for around 6 years and has been on anti-depressants before, though isn't on them now, after a few weeks of not knowing the full story and a few arguments he has told me it all last night -

He thinks he's had some emotional troubles since he was 18 and his dad passed away, his family didn't handle it well and he had to step up at that point. He's since had therapy but didn't think it helped and has been on anti-depressants on and off since.

I told him I love him and will support him, I promised him that as long as he's not been faking anything for four years then he is still the same person I love so nothing changes in that regard. He promised to never hide anything from me again as long as I don't try and 'patient' him, he said he loves his life with me but I can't help him with this, so I made him promise me he'd get help and he's going on the anti-depressants when we get back off of holiday in 2 weeks.

I just wanted to post here to ask if anyone else has been in a long term relationship/marriage with someone with depression and if they have any advice and honestly if they have found it a happy life & relationship?

I will absolutely stay by his side but at the moment I feel as though my world has been turned upside down by the fact my future with him may not be happy, and he may never be truly happy in it. I need some happy stories of people that have had this situation and had a happy life/relationship?

Thankyou

OP posts:
gassylady · 29/05/2019 09:07

It can be very difficult to live with someone long term who will not seek help. Antidepressants can make a big difference as can CBT and other talking therapies. He has recognised that this is related to his fathers death. Will he acknowledge that it is unusual for this type of reaction to be lasting so long. He needs to seek some help via GP. Please be wary of taking on the role of the one that is the only support he will accept. This role really wears you down

gassylady · 30/05/2019 10:28

Sorry OP seemed to have killed your thread- posting again to bump it up for you BlushGrin

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