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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Should I leave

2 replies

cazza7777 · 26/05/2019 20:41

Really sorry for this long drawn out post..
Here goes!
3 years ago I met the man of my dreams,kind,caring amazing lover I felt so special in his arms..we got engaged within 4 months..he had an accident at work which stopped him doing his job and getting depression...he was moved to headquarters which he doesn't like much but it's giving him a step up the ladder to higher things..we had a beautiful baby girl last year..unfortunately while pregnant I lost my mum..since then my family has fallen apart. My dad 6 months after my mum died had a new women.. (his life) I don't speak to my dad,sister or brother..but all my uncles and aunts I do..my husband has totally changed..I constantly tell him I'm un happy and feel alone and I want some affection and to feel loved..if I ask him if he loves me he will reply.."am I that insecure I need telling"
I've sat down and told him how I feel I've messaged him..I've tried date nights..flirty text..love notes in his lunch box..but still nothing..not a hug..peck anything..he says sex isn't everything which I agree but there's nothing and we haven't spoke for 4 days..as I made a move in bed..and he was just reading news on his phone basically totally ignore me...I get so upset and I'm so unhappy..then I get mad and upset..he says I need to talk to someone because of my mum dying and all the family fall out..that doesn't bother me they've never really been in my life anyway..I miss my mum but unfortunately life and death happens..I work in the hospital so see it everyday..I've had to stay strong for my kids and myself...I still can't believe my mum is dead..but we always think they'll be around..how I am feeling now was going on long before my mum died..I'm just looking at life now as it's so short and you've got to be happy...
He says he's fine and his depression has gone..if I didn't talk to him I think he would stay silent forever..
He would never hurt me he's loyal and would do anything for anyone..but there is no intamcy,laughter,fun..its like I'm living with a mate..
Sorry for babbling but I don't know if it's me doing something wrong and needed to just let it out..

Thanks for reading this.. xx

OP posts:
EKGEMS · 26/05/2019 20:46

Unfortunately your husband is content as is and will not change his fundamental nature and what he has to offer you is inadequate for you (or anyone else for that matter.) I think leaving is your best bet unless you want to have a come to Jesus talk with him first but I wouldn't hold my breath

cazza7777 · 26/05/2019 20:50

Thanks for taking the time to read my post..I think you've hit the nail right on the head..I don't think he's going to change and maybe me going may give him a shock..but then again I doubt it x

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