Last night was the final straw

[Longestlurkerintheworld]

I've posted a couple of thread recently about my p*as poor relationship and the general consensus was I was better off with out him. Well Last night was the final straw... came home to the house generally a mess and listened to him moaning he was tired all evening. I took my self off to bed and sent him a text telling him not to bother joining me as he hadn't showered for four days and quite honestly I think it's disrespectful. ( lack of hygiene on his part has been an issue really).

This morning I let loose all the things I've kept quiet since the start of our relationship and it just spiralled from there I told him it's over and I've just had enough now, and I have. The last 24 hours reslly have been the final straw.

Now to start picking up the pieces and move out and get on with life I guess. Has anyone successfully managed to stay living together in the short term with their ex, like room mates? Is it just going to be easier to bite the bullet and scrape together the cash and get my own place asap? Has anyone experienced sharing care of a baby under one, I don't even know where to start with what is reasonable here ?
Child benefit is in his name because I'm am stupid, how do I change that?
Sorry for all the questions, my head is a mess and I'm not even sure what I've typed makes sense.... aaaaaagh !

Are you married, do you own or rent, whose name is the house in, who gets the tax credits? You should never have allowed the child benefit to be paid to him but that just tells me he's a bully .

Not married, rent but tenancy is in his name only. Erm I don't really understand all the tax credits/ child benefit stuff fully if I'm honest. We get universal credit, claimed jointly, which is paid into my account. He gets the child benefit paid to him, he sorted it when DD was just born and I didn't have the energy to question it then. I've requested he change it to me as then I'll get my NI paid until I'm back in work.
Due to his work it's likely I'll be DD main carer so hopefully it will be sorted then.

Congratulations on deciding to end it.

I suggest you get yourself to Citizens' Advice first thing on Tuesday and sort out what exactly your entitlements are to benefit, housing, child benefit etc.

I'd say you were in quite a good position to be rehomed by the council if the house is in his name and you are splitting up. Can you go and see your local housing officer tomorrow and tell them about your circumstances? Get the ball rolling.

I see you're not working so might be difficult to get a private rental. Think you'll need to be living apart when you apply to get the child benefits off him. Be warned, this won't be easy, but you'll just have to persevere.

Can you open a separate bank account just for you - that way the child tax credits can be paid into this when you're ready.

Are you safe?

I'm safe, tensions are a little high bit he's never been violent. In all honesty I'm the more volatile of the two of us

I've looked on the universal credit calculator and I think I should be ok financially, although I'll have to be mindful of spending. I have a small amount of savings and a credit card which should tide me over. I was under the impression that as I'm already claiming universal credit we would just let them know we had separated and it would be separate from them on but as I had already claimed it there wouldn't be much hold up if that makes sense ? I'll also get child maintenance payments once were apart so that will help a little bit ideally I need that alongside the child benefit to live ok long term I think.