Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

I need to get this out. I cant take it any longer.

10 replies

Rosielee93 · 26/05/2019 15:04

Im severly depressed and anxious. I have crippling health anxiety due to a brain hemorrhage last year and its all gone down hill from there. My boyfriend has started being verbally abusive towards me. He says all the usual insults like calling me a cunt, saying no one likes me, he hates me. All usual forms of verbal abuse. Until a few weeks ago, in a heated argument he said drop down dead i hope you literally die right now. I couldnt believe it. I nearly threw up when he said it.
After what we went through last year i literally did nearly die and he said that. I still cant believe it. All its done is fuelled my depression and anxiety even more. No one knows the things hes said to me. Everyone thinks hes the perfect boyfriend. I feel so low like i never have before. The one person who was there with me through it all at the hospital, he was there when i was told about the bleed on my brain, he was there at every appointment supporting me through it all. Then he said what he said a few weeks ago. Its ruined me. Ive already rang Samaritans once and spoke to a lovely lady but not about my boyfriend just the health side of things. I just need to tell someone. I know i need to leave him and i will i just need to get myself sorted first.

OP posts:
Pipandmum · 26/05/2019 15:05

You won’t get yourself sorted until you leave him. Get out now.

FabledChinHair · 26/05/2019 15:06

Leave him and then get yourself sorted, he will probably get worse. Can you stay with family?

IsThisSeeSawTaken · 26/05/2019 15:22

:0( those are pointedly cruel and heartless things to say to someone recovering from a huge health issue. I would something in yourself has changed significantly following the haemorrhage/recovery period (anxiety; is the depression new?) which would have affected your confidence, outlook and behaviour. That is normal and to be expected - there can often be some degree of post-traumatic stress disorder too, once you realise how close you were to death. Remember that you’ve done extremely well to have come through the other side - many do not survive or are left with much impairment. Either that or he has changed for reasons unclear to you at present. Still, it doesn’t give any excuse to behave this way.

I’m sorry it’s not been a nice period of recovery for you, speak to someone close about this, try not to hide it all. If he doesn’t improve then I think it would help your sanity to leave cleanly and immediately rather than embroil yourself in finding out why. He’s nasty and I doubt this is the worst he is capable of.

There will be people to support you. Don’t be afraid to ask.

AlwaysCheddar · 26/05/2019 16:33

The “usual” insults? He’s a dick. Leave him.

MrsMaisel · 26/05/2019 16:40

This is horrifying. He's an abusive bastard and you have to run the hell away from him.

Rosielee93 · 26/05/2019 17:37

Im not saying usual insults to suggest that is normal. Just what verbal abuse starts with and then it usually progresses..
I need a counsellor i know i do.
Im on the waiting list.
I just thought after what we've been through, what hes seen, whats happened, he wouldn't want to hurt me.
Of course hes regretful, apologises every day ect but how can a person ever get over that?!
Its the lowest blow you could ever throw at someone.
When he said i hope you drop down dead i literally thought i would thats how severe my anxiety is.

OP posts:
Dragongirl10 · 26/05/2019 17:39

Just leave...ANYTHING will be better than this

Rosielee93 · 26/05/2019 17:49

Already have a bag half packed but don't want to go back to get it.

OP posts:
Katenobody19 · 26/05/2019 17:54

So sorry to hear this. This isn't how verbal abuse starts, this is waaaay after the start, this has already gone too far. You will feel so much better when you leave. Who can you ask to go with you - or for you - to get your things? You can to this, you owe it to your future, happier self

user1486131602 · 26/05/2019 18:38

The law in the uk says the names he is calling you is ABUSE.
I know this because my DH called me those names and treated me the same, I have recently asked for a divorce.
Please do stay he will destroy your soul if you let him.
You sound like you have a lot on your plate and an abusive partner will not help. Put your energies and love into yourself.
Contact women’s aid and your dr, ask for help.

Love and hugs

New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread