Any mind readers out there?

[Deludingmyself]

Was seeing a lovely guy for a few months, but he said he recently wasn’t “feeling it” and we agreed to stop.
A few days ago I had an upsetting situation to deal with and I texted him. He was, as ever, very kind and thoughtful. The situation was expected to last s couple of days. He offered to come over and brought dinner for us. Later on he said he’d leave to let me get a good sleep or could stay if I wanted him to.
Rather than be on my own I said I wanted him to stay. It was really comforting and he didn’t try anything. Once he knew I was ok the next morning he left and sent a few texts the next couple of days asking how I was saying he was glad he could help.

Is he just being nice or is he still interested? I still have feelings so might put more weight on this than I should.

He sounds very kind and I think he was being nice, but I don't know him, you do, what do you think OP.

Being nice and a good friend i would say.

Sorry op.

He just sounds like a really nice guy and to be treasured as a loyal friend. They are hard to find.

Sob. I think you’re right.
It was only just over 2 months so I had no expectations when I texted other than a friendly ear - you just get used to turning to them 😓
Yes, I think I will treasure him.
Thanks for your replies x

I'm going to try to say this as nicely as possible, but maybe he isn't an appropriate person to help you through a difficult time?

If he is a good person (and it sounds like he is) he might have found it very difficult to say no when you called him up in need of help. But getting your ex (who you only dated for a short time) to come over and stay the night is maybe a bit...unfair on him? You sound really down and vulnerable and I understand that you were really in need of comfort and support, but it could almost read as a bit manipulative.

I'm really sorry about the situation you're in and I don't want to sound cruel, but I think you should maybe lean on platonic friends/family. This isn't an opportunity to find out if your ex could be persuaded to start things up again.

He was the only person who knew about the situation and I couldn’t discuss it with anyone else. I just in a moment of weakness couldn’t face it on my own. But all I was expecting was some kind words, honesty.

I didn’t ask him to come over. I would never have done that.
He asked if I wanted him to.
I really respect him and I’m just giving him space now.

If it didn’t involve him I would absolutely not lean on him, but this did and he was the only person I could turn to, which I only did after a lot of deliberation. Totally see your point though and thanks for pointing out.

I understand if he was the only person you felt you could turn to. But saying that you only wanted a friendly ear is a bit disingenuous.

You could have said "that's a kind offer but no thanks" when he offered to come round. And you certainly could have not said "yes, please stay the night and sleep in my bed". And now you are all full of hope that maybe he wants to get back together with you.

Be honest with yourself: your heart leapt when he said he'd come over, and you hoped that something would happen in bed together. That is totally understandable - you say you still have feelings for him - but maybe don't do it again.

I think you will find it difficult to keep this man as a friend. How would you feel if he met someone else?

Mind yourself.

I only expected words of reassurance/kindness. I wasn’t at all expecting him to offer to come over, and he didn’t straight away. This was a few hours later. I didn’t even remotely suggest it. But maybe I should have said no, however at the time I accepted. I was also too worried to get excited about it, just relief really.

I also didn’t make a move on him and it wasn’t awkward at all. It was just nice to lie beside him for those few hours which were quite difficult.

Windmillwhirl

Absolutely. I realised that today... so I decided to give him space. I won’t contact him unless he contacts me first. I’ve archived our chat for now.

He’s quite a private person so I doubt any new gf would be immediate knowledge to me thankfully.