Does marriage counselling work?

[slummymummy35]

Hi everyone,
Quick backstory is that my husband and I are close to separating. Many years of him drinking too much and being angry and verbally abusive came to a head in January of this year when he got very drunk one night, punched a hole in our door and went to punch me. His yelling woke up our 5 year old. I threw him out and started divorce proceedings. He moved back home after a few weeks and has been sleeping in attic ever since.

We have just found out that the penalty for breaking our mortgage term is over £4K and have decided to try to wait it out until November. This means living together in our house until then. He has suggested marriage counselling in the meantime to try to fix things. He is trying really hard and is being the perfect husband. I'm just not sure if it can all be fixed...too many broken promises in the past and too much hurt means I just don't trust him. But I figure I may as well give it a go...it can't make things worse can it?

Does anyone have any positive stories of marriage counselling you can share with me?

Thanks!!

It s not recommended.
Go on your own. Let him go alone to seek help.for his anger

www.thehotline.org/2014/08/01/why-we-dont-recommend-couples-counseling-for-abusive-relationships/

Is his abuse isolated to when he drinks? Does he have a problem with alcohol and is he still drinking?

Does he accept he has caused the problems through his behaviour?

Marriage counselling caand does work, however it depends on the issues, the willingness to make it work, the acceptance and remorse where one party has caused the major issue and a number of other factors.

Marriage counselling assists with communication, helping each party to let the other know how their actions affect them and communication their emotional (and other) needs in the marriage.

In your case it sounds like years of broken promises have made you detach and I wonder what his true motivation for wanting the counselling is? Is it purely financial?

Every couple experiences marriage counselling differently. If you want to try, then I would give the MC the true history in the initial assessment and ask if he/she would recommend counselling having heard the background.

Let a qualified professional determine if he is abusive once they have all the facts.