Do you think some people are just not ever meant to have a happily ever after?

[ItsJustMyOpinion789]

First off just want to state I'm not looking for pity, just wondering if anybody else agrees.
I'm 30, 2 children, 2 previous long term relationships but I just can't ever see myself getting married or having that happily ever after. Thought I was happy in one of my long relationships but realised when it was over that I was only telling myself I was happy because I didn't want the relationship to fail.
Several female members of my family have been hurt badly by men and my own dad left when I was young, I feel like this contributes to my negative outlook on a happy relationship/family.
I'm independent, have been single (aside from brief flings/sex) for about 4 years and have no plans to ever meet another man, I know people say 30 is young and I've got plenty of time to meet someone but I just don't see meeting someone in my future and I can't imagine anyone wanting to spend the rest of their lives with me, marriage etc. Perhaps for some people they are just destined to be on their own forever?

@ItsJustMyOpinion789 You're totally right. Happily ever after doesn't always involve a man/woman.
For me I agree with you and your sentiments, you've put it better than I could.

Kind of agree - my 20 year marriage broke down 4 years ago - now divorced.

ExH is getting married again this year. I have been dating the same man for 2 years but can't envisage myself living with or marrying him or anyone ever again - I don't want to spend 7 nights a week with someone and relish the times and evenings I have to myself.

Adult children (late teens and very early 20s) still come 'home' at weekends and I feel guilty if I don't spend time with them or cook for them etc etc but am working on this! I don't need to feel guilty - they don't need me and are perfectly capable of cooking and looking after themselves

It may be the happily ever after comes from never finding it...

Women happier without marriage or children

Even the happiest of people have areas of their lives that are unfulfilling.

I have decided (realised?) that I am not the 'type' to have a 'happily ever after' in terms of a long term relationship. I can't imagine myself getting married again.

However I can imagine myself having a series of happy relationships, and so the future looks bright, just not in a fairytale kind of a way.

Interesting, I feel the same. I now know that nothing lasts forever, but while the things are good and we are happy, I am enjoying the company.

I have some very difficult years after divorce, have worries I never had when I was married. I have had my heart broken twice but.... this life after divorce is much better than my married life, it is full of hope and choices, while I was married, I was slowly dying inside a day at the time. Nowadays I have some miserable times but the last 6 years of my marriage... were miserable one way or another.. every single day.

I used to think this way. I had 3 kids and was single. I never seemed to meet anyone I wanted enough to build a life with and when I did I got hurt. Since I was a teenager I attracted the wrong sort of men. I kind of accepted that's just the way it was for me and stopped looking.
I'm now 31 and married and we have a child together. I really never saw it coming. Just see it as you haven't met the right person for you yet and it needs to happen when the time is right.

@cookiechomper it's situations like yours that make me think maybe one day it'll happen for me. I've seen it happen that way for a few friends/people I know but just can't shake off that feeling that it won't happen like that for me.

I sort of do believe in fate. People often seem to meet up in the most unlikely circumstances
However I do think keeping love going probably comes down to as many environmental factors as anything. I don’t live with my husband as both of us have been single and have our own children.All the benefits and none of the tedious stuff that gets on your nerves.

That sounds great Velvet, how do you manage your time and space?

I had a LTR with a guy who didn’t feel comfortable about getting married again, after some time I felt shortchanged with it, but years after we ended I have come to appreciate the very nice arrangement we had which I had not paid attention to.. we moved between my house in town on the weekdays to his house in the middle of nowhere on the weekends (although we spent most of the weekends on days out in random touristic places in a 100 mile ratio), we never met on Fridays or Mondays so we both had time and space to do our own things, have one to one time with our kids and pursue our own hobbies. It was the perfect balance.