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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

What should I do?

12 replies

doingbits · 21/05/2019 07:35

My partner left me and our home just over 8 weeks ago. Communication has broken down and we’d been distant towards each other. The weeks prior to her leaving had been awakened, rather than hostile. There had been no discussion prior to her leaving; she came home, packed her belongings and left one evening. It all happened very abruptly and this was heartbreaking. A lot has happened in my life during this past year, most significantly redundancy and a family member being murdered. These events had lead to me feeling emotionally numb and this has been difficult for all.

In the first few weeks since she left, we had almost no communication. I arranged counselling for myself, and suggested relationship counselling for us. She wanted time alone, so was not open to the idea. There were a few weeks of carefully balancing giving her space and communicating how I felt about her. I made my feelings for her clear and let her know that I wanted to find a way to reconcile; we are engaged, and I still want us to marry.

We eventually spent some time together, talking or just enjoying each other’s company. We attended a counselling session, and decided to move forward with it together. Unfortunately, there’s a waiting list and so sessions will not start until next month.

While things seemed to be heading in the right direction, my partner understandably has mixed feelings. In recent weeks, she has been running hot and cold towards me. She would be very affectionate one day, and hostile the next. I took her out for her Birthday and bought her gifts which she loved, but she almost ignored me entirely on mine. She calls me whenever she needs help with something, but then goes silent for days. She suggests seeing each other, then cancels. She is tactile with kissing and holding hands, but then does not want to be near me and gets angry towards me. She is clearly confused, but this is also very confusing and unsettling for me.

We both have a daughter from a previous relationship. Her daughter spends time with her Dad on alternate weekends. My daughter’s mother died three years ago. Neither of them seem to want us to reconcile. In fact, my partner has said that her daughter has told her that she refuses to move back if we do reconcile. My daughter is indifferent to the idea, saying that it is my decision. My partner has hostile feelings towards my daughter, and appears to ignore what she has been through with her mother passing away.

While I acknowledge these are huge obstacles and are best dealt with in family counselling, my partner feels it seems impossible for us to get through them.

My partner is now on holiday with her daughter along with other family. We are supposed to talk when she returns, but I’m very anxious about the whole situation. She has not communicated with me while she’s been away, unless it was to help her with something. It’s approaching the anniversary of when my family member was killed, so it is a traumatic time for me and I feel very vulnerable right now.

I’d value any thoughts or suggestions you might share to help me cope with the situation, and what you think is the best way forward. Is it really impossible for us to reconcile and should we go our separate ways?

OP posts:
doingbits · 21/05/2019 07:39

“awkward”, not “awakened”, in first paragraph. Sorry!

OP posts:
peachgreen · 21/05/2019 07:40

Why would you want to marry someone who is hostile to your daughter? I'm so sorry for the loss of your wife but your daughter deserves better than to live with someone who is unkind to her.

Quartz2208 · 21/05/2019 07:41

Yes I think you need to let her go

doingbits · 21/05/2019 08:16

I’ve been distant from all the people I love, so my partner would say that I’ve neglected her and both our children. Grief has really affected me, and I’ve been struggling for some time. I would mostly be silent or withdrawn, but often frustrated and dismissive. This is why I’m getting counselling now. I think my partner blames my daughter for a lot of things; she feels as though my daughter has tried to come between us and ignores her daughter. She accuses me of giving her a “platform of power”. My daughter has been through so much though, so I’m not quick to judge her. I was a single parent since my daughter was 5; her mother was not in her life until only 4 weeks before her mother died of cancer. I can only imagine how deeply this affected my daughter, but I always try my best to put myself in her position.

The two children don’t get along famously, but they’re very different people and at different ages (17 and 14); they don’t fight or argue.

I want to marry my partner because I love her, and both our children. I don’t believe in giving up on a relationship without trying to save it first, but I want to do what’s best for everybody if I can.

OP posts:
Viviene · 21/05/2019 08:23

I think you need to let her go. She doesn't want to be with you and had moved out. Leave her to it.

Pinkybutterfly · 21/05/2019 08:28

Sorry op. I think you need to allow space and time to heal. I believe CBT will help you, talk to a friend/ family... Are you back at work? I think you need to allow her time to think and make a decision. It's not ok to ignore you but call you when she needs help. I know you want her close, but this isn't the best way. All the best

Pashazade · 21/05/2019 08:30

How long have you been with your new partner. It isn't clear. It does look as though she has had enough. It may be better for all concerned if you concentrate on helping yourself deal with your grief. Sadly sometimes these things don't work out but her antagonism towards your daughter is not good and really this should be your concern.

hellsbellsmelons · 21/05/2019 08:32

You need concentrate on yourself and your DD right now.
Stop trying to reconcile for the time being.
Let her go.
Separate properly. No contact is the only way forward.
You cannot move on with you and your life until you let go properly.
I realise you love your partner but she is unkind.
To you and to your DD.
She blames your DD things and that is not OK.
You need to put your DD first now.
This isn't going to work out so it's best you cut ties now.
Her DD doesn't want to move in again anyway so that's just not going to work.
I'm sorry for your losses but you are grieving and you really need to deal with that without any other drama.

LizzieSiddal · 21/05/2019 08:35

You shouldn’t want to be with someone who is hostile towards your daughter.

Go and get counselling for yourself and let this woman go.

ChristmasFluff · 21/05/2019 08:38

She's not confused, she's playing you. No-one would want to get back with someone who openly despised them, so she's giving you the minimum to keep you hooked.

doingbits · 21/05/2019 14:53

@pinkybutterfly I’m still not at work. I get out of the house as often as possible, but contact with people is limited right now. I go to the gym as often as possible.

@pashazade We’ve been together for almost 6 years. I agree she’d had enough or else she wouldn’t have gone; leaving in the way she did meant that there was no discussion about that choice though.

@hellsbellsmelons Do you think there’s no way forward at all, even with family counselling? Should I really abandon hope and cut all ties when I never wanted to lose either of them? It’s a hard decision to make.

@ChristmasFluff Who are you suggesting despised who? I certainly did not despise her. It does feel that contact is limited to what benefits her, but I could be wrong.

OP posts:
doingbits · 29/05/2019 05:10

So, within the last ten weeks, my partner has gone from leaving the home to agreeing and committing to relationship counselling with Relate, to spending quality time with each other, telling me that she does love me, wants me and kissing me passionately, to being uncertain and confused, and now to saying that she needs to stand by her original decision to leave. As a result, I feel far worse than I did when she first left, as it genuinely felt like we were on the path towards reconciliation; I feel rejected all over again because I’ve really been so emotionally invested in trying to build a new and better relationship for us.

Relationship counselling is due to start very shortly, beginning with a session alone for each of us before continuing with sessions together. I really do believe we should continue with counselling, as it has the potential to reframe thoughts and turn the situation around. When I last spoke with my partner a few days ago, it seemed she would still be attending her first session alone, but it was not clear whether she’d be willing to attend the subsequent joint sessions. We agreed to have no communication between now and when relationship counselling starts, and I wrote a letter to her immediately after we spoke expressing my hope that she gives counselling a chance and asking her to give it more thought.

How should I move forwards? Is it time to say I’ve done all I can, accept that she does not want a relationship with me and try to move forward with my life without her? I do not want to go our separate ways before trying everything we possibly can, but I know it is not my choice to make alone.

OP posts:
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