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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

How to leave my partner

3 replies

Locolou · 08/05/2019 11:20

Hello, I’m in an emotionally abusive relationship with the father of my children.
I have been very unhappy for a long time, but just over this weekend I have made the decision I don’t won’t to continue in this relationship. We have six children, I’m a stay at home and he goes to work. We live in rented accommodation. I can’t afford to leave, and have stayed for so long hoping things would change. I have always felt sorry for him in the past when I’ve asked if he would leave but over this last weekend I’ve felt strong mentally for the first time in 15 years and have come to realise I do not love him anymore. He has always withheld money from me, tells me everyday in front of my kids how little I do and calls me names. If there is anything wrong with me health wise, then I’m not allowed to get the xrays that docs send me for. He will put me down in a very calm voice but then say he didn’t say anything. He has slept on the couch nearly two years, we haven’t been out together since having our children and we just don’t love each other anymore, I want to leave the relationship but he says if he had more money then he’d leave but he can’t afford it. How do I get out of this situation, any advice please as I can’t do it anymore, not even for the kids? He just wants me to stay in the relationship to punish me everyday

OP posts:
HennyPennyHorror · 08/05/2019 11:32

Firstly well done. Secondly...you need to move out yourself with your children asap.

Do you have any friends or family to stay with at all?

If not, call Women's Aid immediately. They can get you out and help you to get new accommodation away from him. I know that probably sounds awful....a women's refuge....but they're good, good places and you will only be there for a short time.

You will be priority for housing and they will help you with more than just a home.

Locolou · 08/05/2019 16:14

Thank you for replying.

No friends or family that I could stay with unfortunately.

Would they take me even though it’s emotional abuse, not physical?

OP posts:
HennyPennyHorror · 08/05/2019 22:51

Yes they would take you. The most worrying thing is him stopping you from sorting out your medical issues.

It's highly abusive.

If you call them, they will help you. I will keep coming here to check on you and support you as you go alongx

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