Hi, this is my first time posting , i'm looking for sound advice about my next step concerning my partner's drinking. We've been together 9 years have 4 children (2 are his step kids). He drinks every weekend , heavily. I used to drink myself but i woke up when i realised it was affecting my children. In some way i feel like a hypocric but i'm the only one who seems to have our childres best interests at heart atm. We split up 4 years ago for 5months because of how negative things had become(arguing mainly). We slept together a few times during the split and i became pregnant. Found out at 3 mths. I didn't drink a drop during our split but my partner got worse. We got back together, i wanted to make it work for the children. Days after he came back i found out he'd been hiding a 6 yr porn addiction. The bottom fell out of my world. All my relationship was a complete lie. It ruined my pregnancy. He didn't stop he just found other sneaky ways to view it. I kept finding out. Had to go on antidepressants because of the stress. He's only stopped drinking for a month in the whole time we've been back together. Loads of empty promises but no actions to back it up. My friend came to inform me back in January that they'd been messaging each other ,i knew they'd spoke a few times thought nothing of it other that he was being nice and they got on. She came to me because she thought we were on a break but he'd come back. She showed me some messages where he'd asked her ''to suck my c**k" , it wasn't a statement because he brought it up again and there was a discussion about his penis. I've never in 9 yrs heard him say this. He said he didn't remember when i asked him about it , he does seem to have alot of 'memory loss' . Said he didn't know he'd done it , so why then are the messages deleted on his phone but there are older messages from other people. I feel like such a fool . He did this to his ex but i dont know the exact details. I came off my antidepressants 6 weeks ago and i'm realising i didn't process all this when it i found out that's why it's on my mind again. Atm i'm emotionally switched off for him , which has not happened before .He went out last Sunday at 3pm to the pub and dodn't come home until 1am Monday morning. No phone calls ,nothing. When he came in i went downstairs just to tell him not to come to our room as he's impossible to be in a bed with and tbh he makes me want to be sick when he's in that state. So for the last few days i can't bring myself to even look at him , i'm giving him one word reply's because i'm trying to shut off my emotions. I've took off my engagement ring. He slept on the sofa last night which is rare with us. He hasn't offered any apology , asked me what's up , nothing. It's as if he's pretending all is hunky dory. I've told him he has to go , twice. That's the most conversation we've had. I need to tell him how serious this is and i'm done but i can't find the emotional energy. It's always been me to fix things you see. Any advice welcome on my options for my next move.Thanks in advance.