am in total shambles right now, I should be out enjoying my birthday today but I am at home feeling depressed, stressed and crying. I have uncovered that my partner of 12 years has been having an affair for 6 years the woman lives in his home country (he travels there once or twice a year) we have been on and on because I feel as if doesnt listen and he is in debt and ruined my credit. He recently came back from his 4 weeks holiday and after doing a bit of digging on facebook I discovered photos of him and a woman smiling and looking all happy and cosy. He some how managed to convinced me she was just a friend. I still had a bit of doubt there is more, 4 days ago he fell alseep on the sofa and I slipped it out of his hands and started reading his mesaages and going . He professed to this woman how much he loves her and want to spend the rest if his life with her. I woke him up and told him to get the f*out.. I didnt wanted to cause a scene as my daughter was in the bedroom. I contacted the woman and she told me that she knew about me when they started out but after a year or two he told her I was crazy, I was stalking him and left me. He revealed alot of personal information about me to her even about my job. She told me she is in love with him and that she felt betrayed by his deception. She said he messaged he and told her I had him arrested the evening when I asked him to leave(Big Lie). She told him it was over and he's doing everything to get her back posted photos of them together on his whatsapp messaged me to tell me he loves her and not me and that i should get on with my life and he no longer wants me. A week ago he suggested that we have another child and find a bigger place. He's cheated before and i fogave him. I have been crying secretly for days as I dont want my 7yo to see me. I can understand how it went from planning to have another child last week to hating me and spreading lies aboutme.Hehas hurt be deeply. Im in my early 30s and he's 20 years older. I am really heartbroken writing with tears streaming down my face. Apologies for any typos I don't have the energy to go over what I wrote. Im still in a state of shock.