I don't even know what to think anymore

[BelleEnd1]

DP has a history with a particular woman.

I last posted on here about him going round to hers and lying about it then claiming it was to help her with her CV.

Following that, I gave him the ultimatum that if he spoke to her again, I was gone.

Well fast forward to this week where I saw a suspicious text on his phone and checked his phone bill (i know)... over 600 texts sent to her in the last month.

I had it out with him.
I've also had a long message chat with her... turns out she is in love with him and hopes that I will leave me for her.
He said he had no idea she felt like that and just feels sorry for her.

I'm actually just numb now. I'm not cross or upset. I want him to fight for me. But at the same time, how can I possibly move on. I already look like a tremendous mug.

I appreciate I will most likely get LTB comments but I think I just needed to write this out to help process what is happening. I honestly don't know what to do

She isn’t going away, she told you that. He isn’t going to stop contacting her or seeing her. He can lie and say he will but you know that isn’t true.

So if you are not going to LTB you are deciding to share. Are you able to acknowledge that?

Oh no, all deleted and her number stored as a male name.
Despite this, he thinks he hasn't done anything THAT wrong

OP, where is your self esteem? Why do you think so little of yourself that you would contemplate trying to stay with a shit like him for even a moment longer?
Please value yourself properly. You deserve a decent trustworthy partner who will love you, have your back, respect you. This prick isn’t fulfilling any of that. He’s stringing you along, lying to you, and basking in having two poor suckers in love with him.
Please take control of this situation. Throw the useless twerp out, and rediscover your self respect.

Is he also fucking her out of sympathy, too?

If you're the same Belle/bella/ac who has posted for months about your partner you should have had enough responses to LTB! You will never get any other answer than that no matter how many times you ask.
If you're not that poster then my mistake and i apologise.
Either way, this guy has no respect for you and is just using you. LTB

Come on OP. He knows. He deliberately lied and hid his contact with her after your ultimatum because he wanted to be contacting her.

He cares more about the thrill he gets from knowing she wants him than he cares about yours or her feelings.

You have two options really.

Decide that you are worth way more than this and kick him to the kerb. Spend some time healing and working on your boundaries and then hopefully meet a decent bloke.

Or.

Accept that he is always going to lie, cheat and mess around on you. Wear condoms, get regular STI checks and wait for the day you are so ground down and emptied by it that he finally leaves you for another.

He doesn't believe you will leave him so he will carry on doing what he wants no matter how much it hurts and upsets you.

Oh no, all deleted and her number stored as a male name.

Ah yes, how clever to store it under a male name, he must be so proud.
I've had a husband of those, swapped him for one who actually respects me and wants to be with me. I know it's hard Belle, but you wouldn't date him if you met him today. Try to think rationally about what is right for you and stick to it. Not trusting him will destroy who you are, not just the relationship.

"Sorry for her"? Oh please. You know that is 100% grade-A solid gold bullshit, right? I doubt he's capable of actually loving anyone except himself, but like hell was he contacting her because he felt sorry for her. He did it because he enjoys having two women on a string.

He doesn't love you and he never will. Much less fight for you. As a PP said, your choices are live this way and accept that he'll cheat on you constantly, or leave. We don't have any magic wands, and it would take an industrial strength magic wand to turn him into anything resembling a faithful, loving partner.