Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Toxic relationship, miscarriage & end of relationship

1 reply

hopeful20191 · 05/05/2019 00:01

Hi All 👋🏼

Just wondering if anyone has any advice to start to move on with my life...

I had been in a toxic relationship on and off for the past 7 years, I’m 28. I feel like I put my life on hold waiting for him to change and I’m so annoyed with myself. He’s cheated, lied to me, been to prison in between our relationship, is emotionally unavailable, a sex addict (strip clubs & porn) and has been raised on survival so I understand that he will never know how to love anyone properly!

I found out I was pregnant in January and had a miscarriage in March which has completely broken me. I ended things with him when I was pregnant because of his lack of support & interest and found out he was talking to other women and I so badly wished it hadn’t happened at the time, I ended up with depression during the pregnancy and was just filled with dread at the idea of having to co parent with him and/or raise my baby alone. Although what happened was probably for the best in the long run I feel like my heart has been ripped out my chest. I’m feel so low I’ve hardly been leaving my house I feel like a piece of me I missing it’s so hard to explain.

I feel so lost and alone and feel like I’ve been damaged so much form this relationship that I’ll never be able to be in a healthy relationship again. It’s my birthday next week and I have no interested in celebrating or doing anything I just want to hide in my bed.

What steps can I take to start moving on with my life?

OP posts:
Booksareforkids19 · 05/05/2019 00:27

Healing from a toxic person and a long relationship will take time. There really isn’t any way to speed that up.
Just try to recognize the pain he’s caused you and how you felt during the relationship. As time passes, you will feel better, you will be happier, you will want a better partner in the future.
Take it one day at a time. Do you like exercising? Or traveling? Or trying new restaurants? Or maybe a cooking class? Get out of your comfort zone and try different things/ meet new people, or lean on close friends and family for support.
I am a bit older(31) and I find planning a yearly abroad trip to be fun, and I also rely on reading books to take me away from any sadness.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page