feeling low

[coffeegrain]

Apologies in advance for a possibly self pitying post- just feel I want to write it down and get a perspective.
My husband left me with our 18 month old ds 10 years ago. As part of the divorce I bought him out of the family home and remain there, same job, single. I've put everything into raising our son, giving him experiences and generally being the best mum I can possibly be. I've had a few short relationships, but not to the stage of anyone moving in with us.
Currently in working 50 hour weeks. I feel exhausted, as well as running a household, shopping, homework etc
My ex husband now lives with someone, I haven't met her and he generally looks refreshed. He's v sure if himself and I feel he almost enjoys (or at least that's how it seems) the position I'm in.
I don't have time to meet anyone and am not in that headspace anyway. I've gained weight and feel like I'm just keeping my head above water. The time I do have I feel lonely. Not sure what I'm looking for? encouragement perhaps? I feel I've written myself off and will never meet anyone. I'm early 40's. Anyone else feel similar?

OP it seems to me you are doing amazingly well, supporting your DC and yourself alone and being a wonderful parent. This is not a small achievement!! You should feel proud.

When I am down and stressed,I find that it helps lift my spirits when I exercise - endorphins and all that, not to mention it eventually helps with overall well-being and weight loss if needed. Do you think you could squeeze in 10-15 mins of exercise daily?

Another thing that has helped me is Headspace. It's an app and while not all free, it offers some free calming sessions. It's sort of meditation I guess but what it essentially offers is moments of calm and a small amount of time just for yourself and goodness knows we all need that in our hectic life. It could be as short as 5-10 min sessions and could even be done on the train / bus in theory

Thank you sometime, I'm clearly low as your first few lines hit me. I guess I'm just 'there' get on regardless, no thank yous, no treats etc no career development as low self esteem and too scared to make changes.
I'm a gym member, in fact have completed 4 half marathons in this time but I got injured and the increase in hours (overtime) means I'm so tired to do any training consistently at the moment.
I've used the headspace app, I need to address the balance don't I?

Stuff what he thinks! You should feel proud of yourself, OP. You're doing a brilliant job.

Pat yourself on the back, you're doing great. Maybe wait until your son is a tiny bit older and then start on project me - new clothes, lose a bit of weight and get out dating. You're no age at all. You never know what is round the corner. Good luck! X