where do i stand with the house?

[rachjones2009]

I am currently going through a split, i am 26 with a 4 year old, house, dog etc. The house we have had for the last 4 years is going up for sale.. i paid the deposit of £10,000 and i have paid for the mortgage - where do i stand? i need to come out of this and be able to buy somewhere for me and my daughter (i do not want to rent) my daughter also starts school in September and she has been really affected by it all (crying constantly and will not let me put her down) so i need to get it done as quick as possible. could i stop him from taking any profit?
Thank you

Presuming you’re in the UK, we don’t have “fault” divorces so any solicitor telling you that you can get him out of the house or ensure he doesn’t receive any of the marital assets as punishment is a shyster. Where did you find them?

As main carer for your child, you’ll almost certainly be entitled to a greater share of the assets, but that won’t mean you necessarily get back what you put in.

He could get 9k but if he feels guilty then he may accept 5k, especially as you have a child.

You would need to file for divorce and get a consent order which finalised the finances. This is important and would cost approx 1k (divorce fee, solicitors time).

Also if you could remortgage the house it might be cost effective as you save the selling & buying costs.

You have to be married at least a year before you can apply for a divorce so it might be some time before this is resolved. Get proper legal advice.

i am trying to be nice

There’s your basic error. Don’t try to be nice. He’s cheated and has been nasty, not nice.

See it as a business deal where you want to make the most money you can.

What you are deciding sounds reasonable. It was a short marriage and he ended it by cheating. You paid the deposit - I can't see anyone thinking he should have half of that. You've made all mortgage payments and are willing to split the equity, after debts and solicitor's payments etc - that is more than generous. He sounds like an absolute bastard.

Then offer him £5 to go and you keep the house

Op, the answer to this is is is he playing nicely? Your solution is more than fair if you are the primary care giver, but if he isn't playing ball, then it's a nasty legal fight.

So what's his position?

I was told a short marriage means more likely to get my deposit out etc. Longer marriages, who paid for what etc apparently becomes 'historical property' or somesuch, and less likely to be divided in the way it was originally provided iuswim. So short marriage should be in your favour in this instance.