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Original poster

Would you say something....

20 replies

Alfiesmom15 · 02/05/2019 23:22

Me and MIL do not have good history.... in actual fact I cant stand her... many many justified reasons.... HOWEVER I dont show her I cant stand her (ok I have lost my temper twice with her, again justified) but I popped in my local centre the other day during my lunch and she was there, the cheeky cow blatantly blanked me, suddenly developed a fascination with the ceiling.... should I actually bring it up with her and find out what her problem is or just leave it

OP posts:
Booksareforkids19 · 02/05/2019 23:25

Why would you stay with someone if you didn’t like their parents? Strange, to be honest.

Goandplay · 02/05/2019 23:26

Leave it. Maybe the feeling is mutual and she didn’t want an awkward exchange.

starbrightnight · 02/05/2019 23:26

I might turn it round, saying something like

'I think I saw you in the centre and would have loved to stop and chat or maybe go for a coffee but was in a terrible rush because it was my lunch break and I had to get back for a meeting.'

Maybe throw in, 'hope you didn't think I was avoiding you!' As if. Wink

Graphista · 02/05/2019 23:28

If you can't stand her she likely knows and in any case why do you care? Would you have wanted to speak to her, possibly had to get a coffee etc to appear polite? Clearly not so just leave it.

Not everyone gets on that's life just ignore her.

Rosecottage888 · 02/05/2019 23:32

I would've been grateful for the sudden ceiling fascination

starbrightnight · 02/05/2019 23:35

One day many years ago my MIL totally blanked me in the street. I went up to her and in a cheerful, open way, dragged her into the nearest coffee for a friendly catch-up. It went very well, I thought.

She must have felt differently as we haven't spoken in 25+ years. She is dying a bitter and lonely old woman who hasn't seen her lovely son or grandchildren in all these years. Her choice, not mine. Her son won't go and visit her now even though she is very old. I can't say I blame him.

We tried. You reap what you sow.

Lozzerbmc · 02/05/2019 23:36

Starbright has perfect response. I’d say that and enjoy chuckling about it afterwards

Drogosnextwife · 02/05/2019 23:36

Or you could have said hello to her at the time 🤷

Honeyroar · 02/05/2019 23:51

What is your local Centre? If a medical centre she might have been embarrassed, if a shopping centre then fair enough! You say you've never shown your dislike, although it sounds like you have if you've shouted more than once. Perhaps it's mutual. I'd just leave it, you don't need the drama, and at least you didn't have to make fake small talk.

Horsemenoftheaclopalypse · 03/05/2019 00:10

No don’t bother. It will only make the relationship harder/more awkward.
Sometimes people just aren’t in the mood to converse and you sound like you have a crap relationship anyway Blush

pallisers · 03/05/2019 00:12

Why would you stay with someone if you didn’t like their parents? Strange, to be honest.

Seriously? half of MN would be divorced if this was a rule.

Original poster
Alfiesmom15 · 03/05/2019 10:18

I cant stand her because shes shown me nothing but disrespect and rudeness since we've been together I've lost my temper because 5 years of nasty, rude comments, embarrassing me in public and disrespecting me in my own home got too much.... this isn't the first time shes gone out her way to blank me, I just think a bloody polite hello wouldn't of been too much instead of making it blatantly obvious I clearly disgust her.... ah well think I might just ignore it and show her i dont actually care its just more mildly irritating that from day one I've never actually done anything to her

OP posts:
Original poster
Alfiesmom15 · 03/05/2019 10:21

@Booksareforkids19 .... because I've been in a relationship and have kids with my partner not his mom.... I'm not obliged to like her

@starbrightnight that's brilliant Haha I might say that put her on the spot

@Drogosnextwife that's just it I would of some but she moved over to the other side and started staring at the ceiling... strange woman.

OP posts:
Bluntness100 · 03/05/2019 10:21

Did you say hello to her?

Sounds like the feeling is mutual, you both hate each other. And that's fair enough.

Pensy · 03/05/2019 10:26

So easy to get wound up in these circumstances and so hard to rise above it and move on but that IS the way forward to a peaceful happy life. Believe me, I know...

JuniFora · 03/05/2019 10:56

Why would you want any acknowledgement from someone you hate? You don't get on, best to keep it drama free with no interaction.

churchthecat · 03/05/2019 10:58

Why would you stay with someone if you didn’t like their parents? Strange, to be honest.

What a ridiculous comment.

MiraculousMarinette · 03/05/2019 11:25

Why would you want any acknowledgement from someone you hate? You don't get on, best to keep it drama free with no interaction

Exactly. Why do you need a hello if you can't stand her and don't actually want to interact?

SandyY2K · 04/05/2019 00:14

There's no love lost between you. Just leave it. What would you hope to gain from a confrontation?

duebaby2 · 04/05/2019 01:05

To the poster about why would you be with someone if you didn't like their parents? Maybe because people can be all nice on the outside until you get to know them properly (you don't know someone truly until You've lived with them) I love my partner and our son but his mother and her side of the family are weird and unhinged. I wouldn't break up my own family of three soon to be four up to be a single mum because I hate his mum. That's just ridiculous. I don't have to get along with her in order to be with her son

As for the OP if you see her again out just do the same back.

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