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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

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Original poster

ghosting

10 replies

suz56 · 02/05/2019 22:42

hi i broke up with my ex 3 weeks ago because he was a total shit to me all the way through our 22 year relationship the last straw came when he was trying to trace his previous ex from around 30 years previous...the only reason i found out about it was when she msg my son on fb and asked if he new him and my son came and told me ...he just smirked and said that he just wanted to apologise to her because of the way he treated her all them years ago ....i just got fed up with him because of all the lies and deception not just about that but everything he has done and believe me it was a lot....anyway i ended our relationship and he hasn't spoken, msg me or anything since he found her again he has friended her on all his social media accounts and hiding it from me that she is his friend ...i feel betrayed and extremely hurt and i cant move on i expected more than being totally ignored ...my emotions are all over the place ...how do i move on

OP posts:

Original poster

suz56 · 02/05/2019 23:27

can i just add that he speaks to his 2 sons on whatsapp or through sms but ive heard nothing at all

OP posts:

Onemansoapopera · 02/05/2019 23:39

You move on by being grateful that someone you describe as being totally shit to you for 22 years is finally out of your life. Count your blessings!!

WeeWeed · 03/05/2019 00:54

I don't think that would be considered ghosting. You split up with him and he is no longer in contact with you.

TooManyPuppies · 03/05/2019 05:52

You ended it. He has chosen to cut contact. Not ghosting.

JenniferJareau · 03/05/2019 05:54

i cant move on i expected more than being totally ignored

So you actually didn't want to end it or you hoped he'd come grovelling back so you could slam the door in his face?

Namechangeforthiscancershit · 03/05/2019 05:55

Not ghosting as far as I can see. You've split up and getting shot of him sounds brilliant to me

tootruetoyou · 03/05/2019 16:37

I think when you ended it you expected some kind of response that showed he cared or was upset. He has not given you that and it hurts. But, this is not ghosting. You dumped him and a good thing to. He is never going to give you what you want so move on and be happy to have him out of your life.

Original poster

suz56 · 03/05/2019 18:13

yes i did because we have split up and got back together so many times in the past that i guess he would try and come back to me again

OP posts:

practicallyperfectwithprosecco · 03/05/2019 19:30

yes i did because we have split up and got back together so many times in the past that i guess he would try and come back to me again

So you didn't really want to break up

Cherrygirl3 · 03/05/2019 19:41

If you broke up with him in the hope it would make him appreciate you more, and you really want him back, I would try to just live your life as happily as you can. When he realises that you are trying to move on and not pining over him it might just kick him into touch......if that's what you really want. But.....you might just find you actually are better off without him......best case scenario! I think he thinks the grass is greener though, and when he realises Mrs. 30 years ago isn't the goddess in his imagination, he may just find his way back, but by then.........it may be too late!

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