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Original poster

I did flirting and now I feel really guilty

9 replies

DirtyDennis · 02/05/2019 13:43

I was at a work function on Tuesday night. Afterwards me and a male colleague went for a drink. I was quite tipsy and got a bit flirty. Not anything ridiculous but still quite flirty.

I was staying over in a hotel so I went back to my room and stalked this colleague a bit online Blush

I also masturbated Blush

Oh my God, I feel so guilty and terrible and really ashamed of what I did when I got back to my hotel. But I have to admit it felt great to feel sexy and flirty again. I've been with DP for 14 years and we got together when we were young so I haven't done flirting for many years.

Prior to getting together with DP, I was an outrageous flirt and quite promiscuous. I basically turned that off over-night when I got with DP, which I was happy to do.

I don't really know why I'm posting. I just feel really wracked with guilt and there's no-one IRL I can really talk to about this.

OP posts:
gamerchick · 02/05/2019 13:46

I'm struggling to see what you've done wrong OP Confused

Could your relationship do with a pep up maybe?

Original poster
DirtyDennis · 02/05/2019 13:49

We're really happy in our relationship, honestly. We're best mates, our sex life is great etc.

I know I haven't really done anything wrong. I think it's just been so long since I went into flirtation mode (I used to be an absolute professional flirt!) that it took me by surprise.

OP posts:
Cuddlysnowleopard · 02/05/2019 13:51

I really wouldn't worry about it. Sounds perfectly normal and fun to me.

downcasteyes · 02/05/2019 13:56

I don't think you're a terrible person or that you've done anything really wrong here. You definitely don't deserve to feel guilty.

But I do think this is just a tiny bit dangerous for the future, because it involves a real life guy, not a made up fantasy but someone you actually know. That means there's a danger that it happens again. One flirting session is no harm at all, but it's important it doesn't realign boundaries permanently. A regular flirting session which starts to turn into something more is really to be avoided. I know it's exciting in the moment, but your fantastic sounding marriage isn't worth the risk.

Original poster
DirtyDennis · 02/05/2019 14:01

@downcasteyes I completely agree.

I saw the colleague yesterday too and all seemed quite normal so I don't think any boundaries have been permanently shifted.

OP posts:
downcasteyes · 02/05/2019 14:04

Phew! Sounds like no harm done, then!

Maybe take it as a sign that you need to have a few more date nights with your DP!! Or an amazing holiday or weekend away together! Smile

SleepingStandingUp · 02/05/2019 14:06

I don't think you've done anything wring but obviously you need to make sure it doesn't go further.

Perhaps you need to turn that flirting on your husband though

OldAndWornOut · 02/05/2019 14:09

You've done nothing wrong, ostensibly, but I wonder how you would feel if your husband had done it?

Original poster
DirtyDennis · 02/05/2019 14:11

@OldandWornOut Yeah, I think that's part of my thinking. Obviously I wouldn't know about it but, yes, if I did know I'd be really hurt.

OP posts:
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