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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Cancelled date over a week ago but never rescheduled

11 replies

TheIcecreamLady · 01/05/2019 01:03

Hello everyone,

So I was on tinder a few weeks ago and happened to see an ex-coworker who I secretly had a little crush on and possibly he found me attractive as well. I liked him and he liked back, and then I said “Just wanted to say hi”. Anyway we had a little conversation and he gave me his phone nr as is easier for him to text instead tinder. He said he was happy we connected and asked me out like that night, i said i can’t that specific night, anyway all good we didn’t speak for another week, I didn’t want to text first. And then he is like hi how are you blah blah asked me out again and we agreed on date and time one week from that day. 3 days later he texts “i have to postpone getting together I didn’t realize it was my moms birthday that day” and haven’t heard nothing from him, that was a week ago.

I guess he is not interested or I’m assuming he is seeing someone else, but I mentioned that us hanging out would not be necessarily a date, like he called it.

Anyway I do want to go out with him but how should I respond if he texts? I won’t text him first for sure

OP posts:
Decormad38 · 01/05/2019 01:34

Maybe just ask? What have you got to lose?

GinTonicIceLemon · 01/05/2019 01:46

but I mentioned that us hanging out would not be necessarily a date, like he called it.

So did you want it to be a date or not? I dont understand whay you mean by the above? He may be getting mixed messages

Aquamarine1029 · 01/05/2019 01:48

Move on. If he were really interested, you'd know it.

Stepawayslowly · 01/05/2019 01:57

I think if he was interested he would have offered alternatives at the same time he canceled.

Ie sorry I can’t do Friday anymore as it’s Mum’s birthday but I can do Thursday or Saturday

TheIcecreamLady · 01/05/2019 02:02

I wanted to meet more like friends catching up and if something comes out of it, great. Didn’t want to go with this idea that we would start something romantic, i just wanted FWB to be honest, because I don’t want a relationship right now.

That’s what i think aquamarine, but I’ve had this crush on him for months and can’t get him out of my head.

OP posts:
Horsemenoftheaclopalypse · 01/05/2019 03:32

Move on. If he were really interested, you'd know it

This.

Even if you eventually go on a date and shag a few times it is not going to turn into anything long term

JapaneseNotWeed · 01/05/2019 05:47

The danger is he would forget why he had a knot tied in his handkerchief and you’d be stood up.

category12 · 01/05/2019 05:53

If someone told me the date we were arranging wasn't going to be a date, I'd think they were telling me they're not interested in sex with me. Which, if I was hoping for sex or a relationship, would put me off.

LellyMcKelly · 01/05/2019 06:00

He probably thinks you’re not interested. If you are, drop him a text to meet for a drink. The worst that’ll happen is that he’ll say no.

Veterinari · 01/05/2019 06:26

I expect he thinks you aren’t interested as you never contact him first.
If you want to meet for a drink then ask him for a drink. What do you have to lose?

TheIcecreamLady · 01/05/2019 13:54

Thanks everyone! I’ll wait a few more days and text him or get over him!

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