Would you tell someone you have loose skin from weight loss before getting to the bedroom?

[embarrassednamechange15]

Literally just as my title says

I don’t think I would OP but I also wouldn’t want to be with someone who I thought would care , or be repulsed by my body. It’s all down to confidence I guess. I know my DP claims to not know what stretch marks look like (😂 he’s a lamb, but I’m covered in them).

So don’t worry about loose skin.

Yes. I did. It made me feel more comfortable knowing they knew.

I've lost 9st BTW so I do have saggy aspects!

Tbh if it’s your first sexual encounter with someone you shouldn’t be worried you’d most likely be ripping each other’s clothes off ?

Have you said that you have lost a lot of weight? If you have then I think that loose skin would be implied. But I honestly don't think you should be excusing or apologising for your body.

I have loose skin from pregnancy and found it easier to wear nice underwear and have a drink beforehand with dim lights. Now I don't care but needed the confidence boost for the first few months.

Yeah, he knows I've lost just over 14 stone, so I do hope it's quite obvious, although in clothes, it isn't noticeable... hmm.

I won't lie, this is my first sexual encounter ever... I absolutely love him and I don't think he would mind but I obviously don't know for sure and feel maybe quite a lot of men it would bother, especially if I look like my body would be okay, when I'm in clothes.

If your going to go to bed with him feeling self worried then tell him up front. Chances it will make no difference to him but the world of difference to you.

I think so. 14 stone is an incredible achievement and is something to be so, so proud of but it also suggests that you are probably talking about quite a large apron of lose skin? If that’s right then I think talking about it first, and your feelings, is probably a good step towards getting comfortable. If this is a first experience for you, you need and deserve to feel secure first.

Oh bless your heart. You absolutely deserve to have a wonderful time with this guy. Especially on your first time.
If you feel it would help you to feel more relaxed then tell him so you’re not worried about his reaction.
If he’s not nice about it then you know he’s not for you. 14 stone is effing amazing. I can’t even lose 14 pounds and my health depends on it!
Good luck and have fun.

Well done you!

If your loose skin causes more than a +2 size change (e.g. you'd be a 14 without the skin but you need to use 18 to accommodate it) then I'd tell him up front. Just a simple "I need to tell you about something. When I was younger I had binge eating disorder and was much heavier than I am now. Thankfully I've been able to beat it, but it's left me with some loose skin on my belly and thighs, which I'm really self conscious about. I'm really freaking out and thinking you might see it and go "AIEEGH! UGLY" so can I get some reassurance?"

You don't mention how old you are, but I've variously swung between size 10 and size 34. I'm currently size 16 at age 46. I have a lot of loose skin on my belly and arms. There's no shortage of men willing to fuck me!

Wow OP and furious! Im so impressed. How did you both beat obesity/binge eating/ whatever? Not the topic but Im really struggling and getting so scared it wont be psosible.

Gastric bypass.

Thank you very much. I don't have a whole flap of skin, no, but it's definitely noticeable, there just isn't a flap, if you see what I mean?

I actually started with the MyFitnessPal app and lost about a stone on that and then realised I was just eating crap but staying within the calories and it was beginning to get worse and worse so I did join slimming world where I lost 6 stone and from then I found it very easy to continue. I admit the first stone was probably the hardest to shift mentally (it obviously came off the quickest). I had already started an Instagram type thing during slimming world so when I left, I was able to just continue with what I knew (I moved so I didn't want to start a new group) and it ended in the 14 stone off.

I admit it wasn't easy and this sounds bonkers but I used to tell myself when I was desperate to eat something naughty that I can have it, I can go and binge on whatever the hell I want (I had massive spouts of binge eating before I lost the weight) but all I ask of myself is to give myself 10 minutes and to go and look at the inspirations on instagram/fat pictures of me, etc etc and every single time, I'd decide I then didn't want to binge. Knowing I kind of could, made it easier in my head, but by making the deal with myself to always think through before was what kept me really on track. Sounds mental

I know this wasn't a weight loss thread, sorry!

I'm 25, but by the time I was 19, my heart really hurt if I did the stairs up uni and I remember my doctor telling me that this is going to cause me to die young and develop all sorts of problems. It scared me when I didn't feel safe walking up stairs because it always felt like my heart was going to give in. I was offered weight loss surgery (as in to be referred) and I wasn't against it and I would have gone for it if I had failed again but I was so adamant I wanted to give it one last shot.

Anyone who wants to lose weight, I promise you, you can!

I think we all worry about 1st times. I'm sure he knows you have lose skin from cuddling you, holding you etc, it's part of you and it's you he wants to make love too.

Yes I would tell him about the skin so that you’re less worried about it when the time comes. Also, does he know it’s your first time? It’s great that your first will be with someone you really love.

Hi, just wanted to say well done.

I think I would tell him. And then you can get on with enjoying the event itself without it playing on your mind.

Well done for losing all that weight, that’s a hell of an achievement.

Wow, amazing - well done on the weight loss.

Quick guys perspective here if that's okay. As many have said, if it makes you more comfortable then it's best to say. Both about the weight loss and it being your first time.

Any guy worth your time would be 100% supportive about everything and do their best to make you feel safe and happy.

If they dont, then it's a good indication they're not right for you. Best of luck for this new chapter in your life!

I'd be more focused on ripping your clothes off tbh, and losing 14st in an incredible achievement, congratulations

You have an incredible story, respect to you! I'd tell him because you're worrying about it, best to set the tone for the relationship and discuss what's bothering you. Have fun!

Wow what an achievement OP! Well done!

Enjoy and no I wouldn’t say anything prior

I absolutely would, but more for me so I'd feel comfortable and focused on having a good time.

Wow I’m in awe. That’s amazing.

I wouldn’t telll him. He knows you’ve lost lots of weight and he knows it’s your first time, so if he’s a decent bloke he’ll make you feel great anyway.