Husband suggested counseling

[shimmernshine]

Tonight myself and my husband had a bit of an argument basically I had a bit of a tough day plus pretty hormonal.
He was heading out and whilst I didn't mind him heading out I was just feeling a bit down.

Our 5 month old had not stopped screaming all evening plus some woman in the supermarket decided she knew how to deal with dd better than I did and my day was just rubbish in general.

He turned around and said he thinks we should go see someone to which I agreed to call his bluff but was really shocked he'd say that.
5 minutes later he comes back apologizes and says he didn't mean it and doesn't want to see a counselor but in the back of my mind I'm thinking why say something like that if you don't mean it.
So now to top a rubbish day I'm thinking my husband isn't happy in our marriage.

I know I need to talk to him but am I right in saying he wouldn't have said it if there wasn't some truth in it? Thanks

Would you like to see a counsellor? If so, it might be beneficial to you both.

Is he generally supportive and helpful? He knew you’d had a bad day and had been dealing with a screaming baby for hours, and yet he was happy to criticize you and leave to go out?

Talk to him. Counseling can help to strengthen your relationship, but shouldn’t be used as a threat.

I tend to think, especially as heat of the moment, he was just lashing out, and as you say you called his bluff by agreeing.

I think you must have thought it was an empty threat at the time to feel it worth calling his bluff.

You've had a gutsful for today. Arrange a time to sit down and talk things through properly and find out whether although spoken in haste, was it a genuine thought.

Doesn't mean your marriage is over or anything,but sometimes it's worth putting dynamics under the microscope a bit and talking about it
I hope all goes well

I think that your relationship has gone very wrong and he is desperate to try anything to salvage it. What he said about wanting counseling was the truth, then he back peddled because he doesn't want to hurt your feelings.

Take any help you can get - working on yourself is a worthwhile hobby.

Beware of husbands, though. I’ve observed, over many decades, that what they want from counselling is a wife who will give them less grief and be more amenable to whatever the suggest.

So did you argue with him over him going out?

How is he in general? Does he he pull his weight with the baby when he is there (I am assuming you are on mat leave and he works) does he go out alot?

Is there something missing from this? You say you were fine for him to go out, then jump to him suggesting a counsellor. Did you argue in between times?

There is nothing wrong with seeing a counsellor. It's not an insult. But I don't understand why he suggested it at this moment, or then apologised.

Thank you for all the replies it really helped just saying it. I thought our relationship was ok and he does help out a lot when he's home. We've 3 children under 6 so it is busy.

The argument was really silly basically he was asked to go to a family party (I couldn't go as we had no one to mind dc) he didn't want to go even though I told him he should but he said he definitely wasn't going.
I made dinner on the basis he was here for dinner and then he came home from work and was like oh I decided to go to the party after all so I don't need dinner.
It wasn't about the party it was about the lack of communication and had he told me earlier I wouldn't have made the effort cooking as my two older dc were after having dinner at their grandparents so I was basically only cooking for me and him.

It was a really petty argument but it just made me more 'moodier' hence why he said about the counseling.
Definitely going to talk to him today.

It affected you enough to post so definitely worth that head to head. I hope it's productive.